Hi chicks, hi guys, hi no-guys. Among the great upheavals of a life, there is of course the discovery of natural wine, but also, in second position, the fact of having a child. So of course, we are not all destined to give birth, but that is no reason to forget the others, this great reproductive majority who would sometimes have liked to be told certain things about
hell the joys of pregnancy. We’re leaning on that without an epidural.
1. You may bleed from the conk
It’s not systematic, and as in life there are people who bleed from the nose more than others. But during pregnancy they are more likely to exist because progesterone and estrogen increase and dilate blood vessels. Under pressure, it causes bleeding.
2. Sciatic pain
Just because they’re common in pregnant women doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be watched out for. Sciatic pain causes a pinching in the buttocks that radiates from the thigh to the calf and when you’ve never had one in your life, it can be a little scary.
3. You will have bigger feet
As you have understood, pregnancy involves a festival of hormones, among which we can also count relaxin. This will soften the ligaments, muscles and cartilage in order to prepare the body for childbirth.
Sometimes the relaxin gets carried away, that’s how the bones of the foot soften, which usually makes you gain a size. So far so good. But the “softening” of the bones can also cause pain in the knees and hips and there it is less pleasant.
4. You will be constipated
There it is said. Many women are affected by these little problems of constipation so we can be reassured, you are not the only one. Progesterone tends to slow down the digestive process, so this is all normal, but you can review your diet to loosen this concrete block a bit.
5. Your pubic area will hurt
Did you know about ligament pain? Little lucky! These pains often occur in the pubis and spread along the legs with a lovely radiating pain. They can also be at the level of the ligaments of the uterus, because the more it grows, the more it pulls on the ligaments. Logic. But painful.
6. You will never be alone again… Even in the bathroom
Yes, no one warned you, but children are made up of 5% water, 10% blood and 85% glue glue.
7. You will still have contractions after giving birth.
That’s really not nice. Especially since they are called the “trenches”. In itself, this is completely normal, it’s just a sign that your uterus is returning to its original size. In addition, these contractions will close the blood vessels linked to the placenta and will also rid the uterus of its last clots, which is why bleeding continues several days after childbirth, it is called lochia.
8. You will continue to lose blood in full period mode non-stop for several weeks after giving birth.
As we have just explained, it is because of the contractions. The good news is that you will quickly integrate the word “lochia” into your vocabulary.
9. If you are breastfeeding, your breasts may hurt when you lie on your stomach.
Without breastfeeding, you are given a little medicine that will prevent your milk flow and the pain at the same time.
10. A lot, but then a lot of people will see your private parts
There’s more than fuck an “open doors” sign. And a Breton flag. You always need a Breton flag.
11. The maternal instinct DOES NOT EXIST PAAAAAAAS
We’ve already told you but we’ll say it again, the maternal instinct is a pure invention, very practical to make young mothers feel guilty who are not amazed by the thing that has just squatted 9 months in their belly.
Maternal love is also an apprenticeship (just like paternal love), and it is totally 100% ultra mega normal not to feel lost at birth, to not know what to do, to find yourself worthless. Good news, we are not zero, we are just in big panic and it is the opposite which would not be normal. The important thing is to talk about it, to your doctor, to those around you if you are comfortable, don’t stay alone with your anxieties.
12. Be prepared to be told again after giving birth “So when is it?”
If you no longer have a fetus in the container, you don’t lose your belly. He stays there quietly, he’s just limp since there’s no one inside. But from the outside, your body remains a pregnant woman’s body and this belly will leave maybe after 10 days, maybe after ten months, it depends on the body of each one. And don’t forget that your body has had an extreme experience, it’s more than normal for it to be marked by that. What is not normal is that women are required to lay eggs without flinching and keeping a body that corresponds to standards of beauty that are completely disconnected from reality.
13. You might wet the bed a bit.
Do not panic, urinary disorders are commonplace after childbirth (good and also during pregnancy, in fact), this is the reason why we strongly encourage young mothers to rehabilitate their perineum because the sphincters are totally out of order and some leaks may occur. Awesome no?
14. It is possible that the term is over
Nothing too crazy, but it’s true that we tend to imagine that childbirth occurs sooner than expected than the reverse. Relax, because it is possible and not a drama. Generally if you are in this situation you will be triggered on D+2 or 3.
15. Eat as much as you want to eat but remember that giving birth won’t make you lose those new pounds.
If you feel good in this body, it’s perfect, but if a few more curves frighten you to the highest point, be a little bit attentive to what you eat. But be careful, we are not here to tell you to eat less or to deprive yourself or to alarm you on the fact that it is absolutely necessary to lose your “excess pounds”. It’s your body and it’s necessarily good like that since it’s yours, damn it.
16. The first ultrasounds are not done from the outside and it may surprise
At the beginning of a pregnancy you can do what is called an endovaginal ultrasound, the material is therefore inserted into your vagina. You have to know this because it can be quite shocking if you are not warned beforehand.
17. Everyone will give you advice on what to do and what not to do.
Only one solution, very simple: send them balls, it’s only you who knows your body so balek opinions of others. In the same way, you have the right to have a precise idea of how you want to give birth and to demand that the nursing staff respect your birth plan (obviously if the birth goes well and there are no no medical emergency takes over).
18. Pregnant women don’t always have a crazy libido.
It’s a little cliché that deserves to be denounced because it doesn’t happen like that for everyone, far from it. You can also have a low libido because you don’t like your pregnant woman’s body and it’s cool to have big boobs, but big, ultra-painful boobs are less damn cool.