Top 16 reasons to think that Lyon smashes Bordeaux

We like to create conflicts between cities. Especially when basically there is no real conflict. Well, we’re going to make these two towns hate each other just through our gall, because we’re still heartless bastards. Come on, let’s go on a list of fair and realistic proof that Bordeaux is a big shitty city compared to Lyon.

Top 16 reasons to think that lyon smashes bordeaux
Picture credits: Topito

1. Lyon is the capital of gastronomy while Bordeaux is just the capital of gastronomy

Lyon is the city with the most restaurants per inhabitant, they are called “bouchons” and they coexist wonderfully with gourmet restaurants. In short, you are really concerned about food.

2. In Lyon, you are close to the mountains while in Bordeaux, you are close to the Garonne and it’s too much shit

And technically you are even a little closer to the Mediterranean in Lyon than in Bordeaux, which is an argument in itself.

3. Lyon is hilly and not flat like a crushed cat

The city of Lyon is full of reliefs which makes it even more attractive to visit. So yes, some will say that Bordeaux is a more pleasant city to visit by bike, but at the same time Lyon will be recommended for getting more guibolles.

4. One of the first films shot by the Lumière brothers is “Leaving the Lumière factory in Lyon”

And suddenly, it was shot in Lyon. Eat this in your teeth Bordeaux.

5. There are 23 museums in Lyon and only 17 in Bordeaux

Obvious proof that the Bordeaux people are big rednecks who prefer to scratch their balls while watching football matches, unlike the Lyonnais who soak up the culture, their only real oxygen.

6. Paris-Lyon: 1h30 / Paris-Bordeaux: 2 hours

And since I am a Parisian, it necessarily affects me. The rest of France, I don’t give a damn about the steaks.

7. Bordeaux is the second most expensive city in France

And when you love your money, that’s a problem because if the city is expensive, you spend more money and if you spend more money, you have less. CQFD (what is it to say).

8. Because Lyon has the Parc de la Tête d’Or

With 117 hectares of greenery in the heart of the city, exhibitions, films, theater, and a zoological garden, you could even live directly in this park.

9. Olympique Lyonnais smashes everything

And I can tell you that I know very well about rugby too.

10. In Lyon, there are two rivers, so twice as many quays

And a multitude of more places to stick to the edge of the water.

11. In Lyon, there is the Festival of Lights in December

Whereas in December in Bordeaux, you just have to be all black.

12. Alexandre Astier comes from Lyon while Alain Juppé comes from Bordeaux

Question swag we are still on a form of inadequacy.

13. There are three times more students in Lyon than in Bordeaux

Which means that people in Lyon study more than in Bordeaux, obviously. OK, there are twice as many inhabitants in Lyon, but still.

14. Burgundy is a disgusting color

Frankly they could have chosen Vermilion or Anthracite.

15. It rains more in Bordeaux than in Lyon

104 days of rain each year in Lyon, compared to 124 in Bordeaux. It makes you think.

Top 16 reasons to think that lyon smashes bordeaux

16. Lyon has a “y” and therefore scores more points in Scrabble

Well yeah, but the people of Bordeaux had to think before speaking.

Hello, I’m starting to write my top on the reasons to prefer Bordeaux to Lyon, anyway I’ve never set foot in either of these two cities, I don’t even know where it is.

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