Top 15 ways to tell your parents you’re leaving home, Hasta la vista les…

That’s it, you’re big, you’re going to leave the nest but you’re afraid to rush your sensitive and fragile parents. You don’t know how to tell them… Fortunately, you’ve been hanging out on the Internet for several hours and you failed on this wonderful article. Here are some surefire ways to let your old folks know you’re cutting the cord (geographically speaking) without hurting them too much. Don’t thank us.

2. The so-called “fear relief” method

“Dad, Mom… I’m pregnant. His name is Sylvain, he is 42 years old and he is a DJ in Cholet. We’re getting married in Cancun and I love it. [Marquez un temps de pause]… But no, I’m kidding. I’m just breaking out of the house. »

3. The “Karaoke” method

It’s all in the choice of the playlist: “My Dear Parents, I’m flying” (Michel Sardou), “I came to tell you that I’m leaving” (Serge Gainsbourg), “I’m shooting” (Maître Gims) . Ending with a little “I Will Survive” from Gloria Glaynor to reassure them.

4. The “Xavier Dupont de Ligonnès” method (without the fivefold murder of course)

You disappear overnight. It is obvious that this technique is not to be applied in its entirety.

5. The cinematographic method

Have you seen the film “Leave fast and come back late”? Nope ? You should.

6. The inventive method

“And the day I leave the house, what will you do with my room?” Library ? That’s right. Alright well I’m leaving like that, you can do it right away. »

7. The method of statistics

You try to convince them by relying on pseudo-relevant statistics: “No, but wait, the average age of departure of young people who leave the family home is 23.2 years, moreover 54% of young people between 18 and 29 years no longer live with their parents, it is statistically proven that it is time for me to leave. »

8. The anticipation method

You prepare them psychologically by systematically lugging a big suitcase behind you.

9. The crowdfunding method

You offer them to be your guarantor and to send them all your rent receipts so that they continue to feel concerned by your existence.

10. The mime method

You try to mimic a majestic dove taking flight, even if you look more like an old lame pigeon at the end of its life.

11. The deterrent method

You prevent them from wanting to keep you in their home by spoiling their daily lives with your dirty clothes lying around everywhere and your inopportune forgetting to flush the toilet… What, are you already doing it?

12. The Tragic Method

You choose a rainy evening and you announce to them in a ceremonious tone that your time has come, that from now on, you will only be a guest in this residence of which they are the hosts. If you only express yourself in alexandrines, it’s even more effective.

13. The ultra violent method

You break them. You destroy them psychologically: “I’m breaking old people, it smells like death here. I’m tired of seeing your retired faces and your wrinkles are screwing me up. Come on, good life crumbling ones. »

14. The geographical method

“Are you familiar with the concept of population density? In fact, it is enough to divide the number of people living in this apartment by the surface of the latter. And frankly, judging by my calculations, she’s way too strong. Someone has to go… Me? »

15. The playful method

You make them guess using a charade… “My first is the first letter of the alphabet. My second is, according to the religions, a supreme, unique and transcendent being. My third comes out of the cow’s udder. My fourth is the opposite of young. My everything is an announcement that I have to make to you…”

We hope that thanks to our wonderful advice, you will easily manage to make your parents understand that it is high time that you cast off, what am I saying, that you leave the nest, that you take off, that you BREAK YOU FROM HERE. Good .. the best thing is to choose them a good gift for parents history to better pass the pill.

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