Top 15 things to do to attract more teachers to schools (little ones, come on…

I don’t know if you are aware, but the start of the school year is going to go very badly for a lot of people. And no, we are not talking about your kid who will still be next to Yvan who cuts his veuchs in progress, but rather of the teachers who will have to take on the thousands of teaching vacancies. And frankly, it’s not going to be a cakewalk. But as at Topito, we take the education of kids to heart, here are some tips that the National Education can put in place to encourage people to become a primary school teacher. A+ in human resources assured.

1. Organize a Disneyland outing for them every year, but only with the CM2s who are ready to do the Tower of Terror

Would miss more than that, that they find themselves with the primaries to make the cups which turn, pff.

2. Offer them blackboard markers in all colors

Honestly, best tactic to deploy to attract teachers, and I am weighing my words.

3. Offer them breakfast every morning

But only slightly dry chocolate buns because it’s the national education budget anyway

4. Install photomontages by Jean-Michel Blanquer in all schools

So everyone will come to see this giant exhibition of Jean-Mimi’s face and people will realize how cool the schools are, and boom! + 135?% of applications.

5. Have Ritz surpluses imported into canteens

Listen, if you don’t want all the teachers to go on sick leave or telecommute at midday, you have to bait the barge.

7. Establish distancing measures for parents of reluctant students

Yes, yes, we are talking about those who insist every year that their child skips a class because “Valentine is HPI you understand”. Take them away from the teaching staff and you will see that the ranks of teachers will fill as if by magic.

8. Take math out of the curriculum and put in more film culture

Maybe everyone would want to have a career in National Education if we replaced divisions and geometry with a binge-watching of the complete Totally Spies. I say that for the school system huh.

9. Quadruple wages

I mean, money can’t buy happiness, but it’s still better to have smooth plastic sleeves than grainy ones. Come on, give them the max increase.

10. Promise them that one student per class will be there to help operate the computer

By granting an IT tutor aged at least 6 years to each future teacher, you reduce the number of resignations per year. It’s math.

11. Allow yoga and bubble football in sports

Because it’s okay to kick ass in the pool all that so that only three kids are dolphins and the others are starfish.

13. Permanently delete parent-teacher meetings

Anyway, nobody likes it, neither the teachers, nor the parents, nor the students, nor the person in the household who ends his evening much later and who misses the start of Koh-Lanta because of this bullshit. Let’s stop the slaughter.

14. Exempt them from fairs

15 years that they end up soaked because of water fights between students who have won guns at the upheaval. It’s for their sanity, believe me, you wouldn’t want them to screw up.

15. Offer them an “Unlimited Books” voucher at FNAC

It immediately seems more attractive to watch geography homework when you know that the latest Smurfs album is waiting for you in the library at the back of the class. Afterwards, it’s up to you.

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