Yesterday, we made you vote to elect the most beautiful thing of creation. We now have the results, and we can say that it gives a nice list of very heavy and redundant things. On the other hand, we are a little disappointed because you forgot that the rich can also be rednecks, with their big cars, their white moccasins and their hats at Roland Garros. Too bad, we’ll talk about them another day.
1. Carry a mullet
He tried to come back into fashion, but he still remains redneck until the end. It’s the height of bad taste, and at the same time we want to show our admiration when we see someone who proudly assumes his mullet.
2. A flame sticker on the car
It’s the kind of thing you have the right to find cool before you’re 10 years old. Afterwards, it is absolutely forbidden by good taste. It should even be against the law.
Classic, classic, but so true. Can a tuning fan explain to us the point of spending so much money to take a normal car and make it totally gross? The prize goes to the guys who can no longer take speed bumps because of their underbody at ground level.
4. Patrick Sebastian
He’s kind of the god of all rednecks, but that’s also why we love him. Who has never listened to a little Patrick Sébastien all alone at home, in secret? Hey, who?
5. The Playboy Tattoo
Already, reading Playboy magazines is not the height of good taste, but deciding to get a tattoo of something that amounts to saying: “I like big boobs”it’s a dive without a wetsuit into the ultimate vulgarity.
6. T-shirts with wolves
There, it’s a little hard. Wolves are still way too good. So yes, Native American-style t-shirts with a wolf’s head quickly make Johnny a fan, but they also show a great sensitivity and love for animals, so we’re ready to tolerate them.
7. Know the lyrics to “Long live the big tits”
Can we really blame people who have inadvertently retained a few sentences from a French song that we made them listen to? Yes ok I know these lyrics, but I swear I’m not a redneck. This song is still super catchy.
8. Tribal tattoo
It’s simple: if you don’t come from a region where tribal tattooing is traditional, like Polynesia, don’t do tribal tattooing.
9. Do a “pull on my finger”
Ok it’s beautiful. But it’s still funny. But it’s beautiful. After all, is it that bad to be a redneck?
10. The dice hanging on the retro
We could also have talked about the toupee on the steering wheel, but the dice alone are already good enough. When someone has them, you feel like they’re a fan of Las Vegas, casinos and strippers. A nice cocktail.
11. Pick-up phrases
We all know the famous pick-up lines: “your father is a thief…” We don’t know if the people who utter them in reality really hope to conquer a woman like that, but in any case it’s very audacious.
12. Wear a Cochonou bob
Ah, that’s a bit of a special case. Finally, those we see most wearing Cochonou bucket hats today are guys who think they’re cool by imitating rednecks, at festivals or other events of this kind. What they don’t know is that, in this way, they really turn into rednecks. To imitate a beauf while thinking of being funny, it is often revealing of its own beaufitude.
13. Cock disguises
Much like the bob, dick disguises are often worn “for the kidding” because “It’s okay, we’re kidding, it’s second degree! »but in fact it’s still redneck, and that’s it.
14. Clip your cell phone to your belt
It’s still a shame because ultimately it’s super practical. Like the fanny pack around the waist. It’s the kind of stuff that makes us want to be rednecks a little.
15. Show your ass in photos
It’s funny that it makes us laugh, the ass. It could have been the elbows, the ankles or the eyelids, but no, we decided that what was funny was the asses. And the dicks. It’s probably because it’s hidden, and otherwise we’d spend way too much time laughing.