If the Americans are surprised by the little quirks of the Europeans, note that the Europeans among themselves are also surprised. Even if Germany and France are neighbours, the cultural shock is real from one country to another. Here are a few examples of things that give our dear pretzel lovers a nice change of scenery when they cross the border.
1. Buy your baguette with a credit card
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Or never have change on you. In Germany, on the contrary, it is customary to pay for the vast majority of purchases in cash. Moreover, many businesses only accept this means of payment. So inevitably, when they arrive in France and see all the Parisians paying with their connected watch… It’s a change of scenery.
2. Have two-seater blankets
Couple or not, in Germany, everyone has their duvet, when it’s not downright, everyone has their own mattress! Welcome to France, may your first night duvet battle be unforgettable.
3. Driving at 130 km/h on the highway
A hard blow for the German driving madmen. At home, on two thirds of the motorway network: no speed limit. Everyone at their own pace. A small detail not to be forgotten when they cross the border, so as not to start their stay with a small fine for speeding.
4. Kiss
Germans greet each other by shaking hands, giving each other a hug or simply saying “Hallo! “. Simple, effective. I can’t imagine their faces when they arrive in France, and they find themselves kissing complete strangers on the cheeks. No but seriously, it would be so much that we stop with the wind, huh. “Hello” and just “hello”, that’s good, right?
5. Not tipping
If a ranking of the country which is the most generous to the one which is the most ratchet in this area exists, there is no doubt that France would be at the end of the pack. In Germany, we give less than in English-speaking countries, but it is still appropriate to leave 5 to 10% of the bill as a tip. You tell me, it’s not huge. But it’s still better than nothing. Don’t be like, the last time you left something, several months ago, it was two filthy dimes found deep in your purse. There’s worse, huh. But there is above all much better!
6. Being consistently late
The Frenchman is so always on the run that he invented a “quarter of an hour” of tolerated delay. Something to justify disembarking at 9:30 a.m. instead of 9 a.m. on the job, with a big smile. You must have already heard of the “Toulouse/Poitevin/Parisian quarter of an hour” (yes, this thing exists for all cities in France). Big contrast with our German neighbors who are renowned for their impeccable punctuality.
7. The triple layer PQ only
Just like the Turkish toilets we deg at the campsite, French toilet paper is a hell of a psychological step to take for our German neighbors. With them, we do not wipe our behinds with just anything. You may find rolls thicker than a ream of paper. We are on 4 to 5 minimum thicknesses. (Source)
8. Go to school until 5 or 6 p.m.
On the other side of the border, classes start between 7:30 a.m. and 8 a.m. (it stings), but end between 1 p.m. and 3:30 p.m. (big max) depending on the day and the subjects chosen. Do I need to tell you that we are far from it in France?
9. And take 2 hour lunch breaks
If German schoolchildren finish earlier than their French friends, the same is true for employees. The Germans finish around 3 p.m. (need someone to pick up the children when they leave, huh) but, in return, only allow themselves a short half-hour lunch break.
10. Not recording bottles
In France, we throw away. Across the Rhine, we recycle as many things as possible. Returning your bottles on deposit is a well-established habit in the daily life of Germans, so much so that a well-established system is applied uniformly throughout the country. Thanks to this, the return rate of reusable and single-use bottles is around 90%. The heart in crumbs when they see us swinging everything shamelessly. Frog-eating assholes that we are. (Source)
11. Only eat ice cream in summer
Why wait for sunny days to enjoy this delicious dish? If we have decided to deprive ourselves of ice cream for a large majority of the year, the Germans do not inflict this trouble on themselves. When we love, we don’t count. The proof: it is estimated that the Germans consume ice cream at 8L per person per year. It’s far more than in France or even in Italy.
12. Roll with shitty cars
CALMS YOU. I’m not judging your little Peugeot. For my part, I love my Saxo. And my guy could definitely marry his Fiat Punto. But here it is… On the other side of the Rhine, we have created particularly stylish cars. BMW, Audi, Mercedes… It’s German. In fact, there, these cars are also used by the working class. Here, driving in merco, it’s not necessarily a rich thing, like at home.
13. Have a basket of bread and a carafe of still water at the restaurant
Something typically French. Among our Saxon neighbors, it is quite rare to have a basket of bread at the table. Not impossible, but not common. On the water side, on the other side of the Rhine, we are a sparkling water team. The French are very nice, but their carafe of tap water is platounet.
14. The size of a coffee
With us, coffee = espresso. Over there, coffee = lying down. When you’re used to putting so much float in your café, the first order on a Parisian terrace must be particularly… Bitter.
15. Using words without 12 “W”, 10 “K” and 20 “R”
Wir lieben Konsonanten, die uns böse aussehen lassen, obwohl wir im Grunde genommen süße kleine Bären sind.
We like consonants that give us a naughty air when deep down, we’re nice little teddy bears.