When I was little, with my friend Victor, at school, we drank water from the urinal flush. Yeah, kids are usually pretty gross. In fact, it’s pretty much the opposite of germophobic people: they can touch, taste and play with the dirtiest things on this planet without even being afraid of getting sick. The worst thing is that children are always more creative for us when it comes to dirt. That’s why we asked you to tell us about your kids’ Facebook prowess. Needless to say, your offspring are filthy.
1. Baptistine’s Dirty Kid:
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“My 2nd son took his diaper full of poop, spread it in his bed, spread it in his big brother’s bed, spread it on the walls and then he put his hands in it and slept. spread his hands over his face”
Topito’s opinion : Ok we are only at the first testimony and I already have a strong desire to vomit. It’s going to be good.
2. Séverine’s dirty kid:
“We keep an old toothbrush to scour the very nice places in sinks and toilets… And siphons… My son brushed his teeth with it. »
Topito’s opinion : By putting a lot of toothpaste and rinsing your mouth with alcohol at 90° it can do it.
3. Florie’s dirty kid:
“He put the toilet brush in his mouth…”
Topito’s opinion : The hypochondriac that I am has just felt faint at the sight of this sentence. I call my doctor right away just in case.
4. Manon’s dirty kid:
“Lazy to go to the toilet, he made his little turd in his underpants and managed to slip it discreetly down his pants to drop it while walking. He was 2 or 3 years old. There you go…”
Topito’s opinion : To be added to the top reasons for not having children.
5. Aurora’s Dirty Kid:
“He was picking up butts/beer caps in the street, and hiding them in his bodysuit”
Topito’s opinion : Probably a future great art collector. This kid has a future.
6. Justine’s Dirty Kid:
“Eating cat poop”
Topito’s opinion : Every time it’s the cat who ordered him to do it. Cats are sneaky.
7. Pouic Pouic’s Dirty Kid:
“My daughter around 17/18 months had fun licking the tiles to do like our dog”
Topito’s opinion : Luckily the female dog didn’t decide to lick her uc at that time.
8. Jocelyne’s Dirty Kid:
“I hesitate between the time he peed in the toy bin, the time he put his poo in the drawer of his room or when he went through the trash to get the spaghetti bolognese in it……and I specify everything it only concerns one of my sons…. »
Topito’s opinion : Are you sure it’s a human and not a little dog Jocelyne?
9. Laëtitia’s dirty kid:
“Going to a chocolate shop, showing me his hands apparently full of chocolate… who really wasn’t… I’ll let you imagine the topo… plus necessarily more tissues, no wipes. She stayed with her hands in the air all the way to the car. »
Topito’s opinion : I will never look at Charlie and the Chocolate Factory the same way again. Thank you Laetitia.
10. Audrey’s Dirty Kid:
“Poop in the middle of the living room and take the broom to clean up… So spread all over the living room!” Or ask me to close my eyes to make me puff his booger”
Topito’s opinion : It strangely whetted my appetite. I’ll be back after my break.
11. Virg’s Dirty Kid:
“My daughter as a birthday present for her little brother whom she adores… pooped in a cardboard box and wrapped it properly as a present”
Topito’s opinion : Ah love between brother and sister, there is nothing more beautiful.
12. Julie’s Dirty Kid:
“My 4-year-old daughter licked the metro line 4 bar. And seemed to enjoy it. »
Topito’s opinion :OMG she could have at least picked 14. Poor kid.
13. Joelle’s Dirty Kid:
“My second, had a hiding place, but she wouldn’t say where or what…until the day I heard her say “ah ah I put you in my hiding place” I decide to follow her with her little finger in the air and discover with horror her hiding place in Mouk. Which was, between the 2 huge seat cushions, of my huge velvet skin sofa which had cost an enormous arm. »
Topito’s opinion : “La cachette à Mouk” is officially the title of my next album.
14. Lucie’s Dirty Kid:
“Gently and lovingly place a booger on my cheek…”
Topito’s opinion : You can’t refuse a gift. At worst it is resold on Vinted. With a little luck it could end up in the worst stuff sold on Vinted.
15. Charlene’s Dirty Kid:
“My daughter had the idea of pooping in her dinette and had fun cutting it up to put some in her little plastic plates to serve nicely to her big brother… I’ll let you imagine my son’s head”
Topito’s opinion : Good ok it’s too much for me, good end of the day to all.