Top 14 tips to help your child fall asleep, and finally be cushy

As Jacques Martin would say, children are wonderful. We love this sparkling look that mixes their incomprehension of the world with their natural playfulness. However, it is true that sending your kid to bed is a very satisfying act in order to fulfill your destiny, alone. Because between us, the best moment of the day is when they pioncent, finally. Still, it requires a lot of skill. Fortunately, Topito is here to help you find those precious moments of solitude.

1. Drive him around the block (but remember to go shopping anyway otherwise it will cost you 135 bucks a nap)

We don’t really know what the sound of the engine produces, but a child in a car, especially when it’s dark and he’s lulled by the lampposts passing by his window, can fall asleep in less than 30 seconds. Good after you have to wake him up to put him to bed so it’s no longer useless. Misfortune.

Top 14 tips to help your child fall asleep, and finally be cushy

2. Grill it early

Falling asleep on a full stomach is not great, it’s even downright impossible. So the ideal is to have him eat dinner early enough, like noon.

Top 14 tips to help your child fall asleep, and finally be cushy

3. Do not expose it to bright screens more than two hours before bedtime

Yes I know it’s hard, it’s not fun and then basically, who are we to tell you this while we spend our lives staring at our computer or our phone to read tops all day long . No really, it’s not correct but it’s the pure truth, staring at a screen ruins a child’s ability to fall asleep.

4. Make him always do the same things just before you pounce

There’s nothing like a little family ritual before going to sleep in such a way that these gestures will directly install the mustard in an atmosphere of “I have to sleep or my mother will hit me”. So of course we’re not talking about nonsensical gestures like doing a cartwheel and sticking a finger in your nose, but the simple fact of reading a story before bed should make him calmly slip into sleep.

5. Have him sleep next to a clock

We would not believe but in fact the ticking, it reassures them and it reminds the heartbeat of his reum. So yes an alarm clock would suffice, but think big mess, think prestige. And for that the clock is essential.

Top 14 tips to help your child fall asleep, and finally be cushy

6. Massage his back or his head

But beware, a child too accustomed to head massages will find it difficult to get used to this celestial manipulation and will inflate you all your life so that you obediently fiddle with his scalp. The best thing is that he learns to do self-massages on his own. And no, I’m not talking about masturbation.

7. Steal sand from the sandman to make him eat it

Tip that works every time even if sometimes it stings a little in the mouth and after you have to vacuum because of all the dust.

8. Give him about 20 pacifiers

Since he always loses his in bed and then starts crying profusely, let him manage with the 19 others that you have placed in his bed.

Top 14 tips to help your child fall asleep, and finally be cushy

9. Sing “Do l’enfant do” in Hungarian

Technique that works even better if you can’t speak Hungarian.

10. Stall it in front of the credits of Thalassa

Eternal sleep assured in front of this music more soporific than Soporifik the character of Pokémon.

11. Put it in the fridge for 5 minutes

Indeed, a cooler temperature should slow his heart rate and help him fall asleep. On this subject, we strongly recommend our article on the good reasons to freeze your eggs.

12. Pour rum into her bottle

Or whiskey according to the tastes of the child.

13. Put lexomil in your compotes

No more than one tube because afterwards, he risks bleeding from the nose and hello the mess in the sheets that will have to be cleaned at the dry cleaners.

14. Kick him on the head

Not necessarily with a blunt type object, a small saucepan should do the trick. On the other hand, it is basically forbidden to hit it with your own hands because it would be a completely reprehensible act of violence.

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