We all have little moments in life when we can be made to swallow anything, because we grant our trust quickly and we are people who give our neighbor a chance. It’s beautiful, but it’s also very dumb. As it is always a good thing to be self-critical and to better target your faults to correct them, we invite you to list some of these moments when we are ultimately much too naive.
1. When you think you’re untraceable in private browsing
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Do you use Google Chrome and think that no one can see what you are watching in private browsing? Let me tell you that your internet service provider already has a full list of the sites you visit, even privately, and that Google is not shy about collecting your information as well and reselling it to the highest-paying merchant sites. Needless to say, Google also knows which hand you’re using to do your little thing. The right.
2. When you’re the only one who thinks your crush is cool
All your loved ones tell you that he’s the worst person you’ve ever met and that it’s bound to turn against you and hurt you a lot, but you still think he’s the crush of your life? You don’t even need to hear your arguments, you’re doing a big bullshit. Check out the couple red flag list and don’t thank me.
3. When you buy concert tickets online that are half the price
If someone paid the normal price for a seat, there is little chance that he would have fun reselling them at half price on the internet. The same goes for tickets to amusement parks, football matches or any other event that usually costs the skin of your ass: you’re being screwed over so put down that bank card right away.
4. When you think you’ll only drink one beer
Some people do it, and it’s probably because of them that you think you can do it too. But no, you are weak, a beer (or any glass of alcohol) will not be enough and you will want more. It doesn’t matter, we all have our cracks and our weaknesses, for me it’s cheese.
5. When we vote for a former banker who tells us that his priority is us
Haha. Not without kidding there were signs that it was a big carrot but you have to believe that people like to eat the same dish twice and that even if it stinks of shit.
6. When you think that betting everything on this small faulty electric heater will have no impact on your electricity bill
We have been told and repeated: abundance is over. In any case, it’s over for us, the lower classes and the middle class, because among the ultra-rich people continue to enjoy themselves. That being said, this electric space heater is going to put you in the red at the end of the month and you know it deep down.
7. When you tell yourself that this is the last time you smoke / drink so much
No, stop lying to yourself and be honest with yourself, you’re going to get yourself such a monumental crate next week and you’ll appreciate it. You just have to find a way to not do it too often and excessively.
8. When we think it’s the last episode, and then we go to bed
The worst lie you can tell yourself. You’ll still go to bed way too late, wake up busted and swear you’ll go to bed earlier at night and end up doing the same thing until the weekend when you’re too tired to go out and keep watching your damn show.
9. When you think that by buying this product imported from the US there will be no customs fees
You have to read all the stupid little lines before ordering on the internet, because it quickly becomes a big carrot for all the costs that are added to the base price of the order. Oh and when the site tells you that the delivery will arrive between one and three weeks, assume that it is 80% of the time more like three weeks.
10. When you think that forty minutes of sport will be enough to eliminate the burger from the day before
Or worse, when we say to ourselves that we will do our sport tomorrow because we are lazy. No, no and no. From the lie we tell ourselves: we’ll have to move our ass well to eliminate fatty dishes and above all we’ll have to stop believing that putting them off until the next day will fix everything. But where we are most naive about sport is when we sign up for the gym the first week of January.
11. When we think we really need that stupid product they’re trying to sell us
If it’s not a necessity but the only reason you need to buy something is because it sells well to you, then you’re screwing up. Now if you are convinced that this electric apple peeler will change your life while you never eat apples, treat yourself.
12. When you still believe this friend always late who says he’s coming in five minutes
We all have this friend who does more false plans than a crooked government, but in whom we continue to give our confidence despite everything. Spoiler: he’s not going to be on time tonight, any more than last time and no more than the next. He is a singular being who does not understand the same codes of punctuality as us.
13. When a charity worker says, “Do you have two minutes?”
At first we say yes, it will last two minutes, but no. Or else it’s minutes of a quarter of an hour. Either we end up giving money (30% for the good deed, 70% to free ourselves from this trap), or we leave saying “no, but I can’t put too much five euros a month in there” when we pay for Netflix and Spotify without asking questions and we feel like the worst shit in the world.
14. When do you really believe in the phrase “let’s call each other and grab a bite to eat soon?”
You run into a friend you haven’t seen for a long time and you have time to chat for two minutes that you decide to cut off with a “no, but we’ll do something soon anyway” because you have other things to do. damn it at the time when even if you really want to, you know full well that the next time you see him he will probably be a grandfather.