After the Spanish lessons and the German lessons often came the SVT lessons (or before, I don’t know your schedule by heart now) and with them the time to put on your beautiful medium-white blouse and put on your ass on a stool twice as big. We spent time in this room, which smelled a bit too much of disinfectant and dust, learning how the solar system works. But against all odds, it left us with a lot of memories, more or less nice. Thank you Mrs. Bouchard for this extraordinary experience.
1. When you had to look at something under the microscope but you couldn’t see anything because you messed up your blade
The white thing there?? Oh no, that’s dead skin… No really, I don’t see, I think I put too much water.
2. When you had to draw the thing you saw under a microscope and it ended your career as an artist
But siiiii look Madame, that’s the membrane and that, the cell nucleus, you can see it?? It doesn’t deserve 5 anyway!
3. When the teacher was talking about human reproduction and you were having your best time, sex was funny
Until the trauma of the childbirth video arrived, which certainly cut off many girls’ desire to fertilize.
4. When you had to practice putting condoms on a polystyrene penis
Wait, what does that mean again? Nah but don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten eh, I too put on condoms in SVT eh… Pff… I remember it very well…
5. When the teacher took out the skeleton and you spent a lot of time wondering who it was
His name was Oscar, strangely it reminded you a lot of Help…
6. When the teacher showed you the effects of cigarettes on the lungs and it disgusted you but you were going to smoke after class anyway
Ffffffff, no but it’s the last one, I don’t want to mess with my health at my age, ffffffff.
7. When you dissected the cold white mouse and hung it and its organs on a wooden board
Has anyone ever had a fainting spell in their class or is on a real high school urban legend like “if a student commits suicide, everyone gets the bac”?
8. When after the mouse, you had to do the frog and sheep lung dissection (well, back then)
The old ones, we know each other. Thank you National Education for this beautiful reform which will avoid many nightmares based on angry animals for new high school students.
9. When you didn’t understand how we could go from sedimentary rocks to how we fucked
If there is one mystery of nature that no one has been able to solve, this is it.
10. When you discovered pH paper strips and used them to see the pH of everything you found
But do you think that an eraser can have a pH?? Wait, let’s take a look!
11. When you discovered that your office was called “paillasse”
While there was no hay because it can catch fire and no straw to drink because anyway, hydration was forbidden in class. Look for logic, that’s what we should have learned in class!
12. When you were trying to turn on the gas from the bench
Yes, you had no concept of danger at the time and death was not too much of a concern.
13. When you turned on your neighbor’s tap water to get yelled at
It was always less fun than the battles of wash bottles in physics and chemistry, but hey, we had fun as much as we could.
14. When you asked all your friends from other classes if they could lend you their blouse because you had forgotten yours again
No, but I promise man, I’ll give it back to you later, it’s just that I had my dissection at 1:45 p.m. and I don’t want to fuck my Yu-Gi-Oh t-shirt.
The next one who confuses the scalpel and the fluted probe takes a shot in the mouth, is that clear??