Out of all the stylish stuff from the past, did you really choose to bring back the little tinted glasses, chokers and fanny packs??? But wow, why?? There was no better?? No ?? Well I swear it is. There were at least these 15 fashions to update before you dressed like in a Lorie music video, seriously.
1. The 10 colors
I don’t know what this thing is really called, but it was madness! A pen, a dozen colors, including apple green, turquoise blue, pink and mauve. Saving space in our pencil cases and the possibility of putting lots of flowers and colors in our textbook: too stylish. Fuck the mistress who only wanted fountain pens, bug…
2. Haircuts from the 1920s to 1960s
I have no idea how much time and patience it took to do my hair every morning, but I’m sure of one thing: it was way too glamorous! After the 1960s, it all went downhill. Welcome to crimped hair, mules and (way too) voluminous blow-drys. Sweaty hairdressers.
3. Film cameras
Even if digital cameras are very practical, nothing beats the beauty of film shots, nor this little excitement of discovering the photos once taken… (or the disappointment of realizing that the film was badly engaged.)
4. The colorful boots of the 1970s
I WANT IT. Color my darling! No but seriously, can you imagine the streets of Paris full of colorful boots on all sides? So ok, I see you coming: YES it’s already coming back a little bit, but it’s still very shy, all the same… I WANT COLORFUL BOOTS ON EVERY STREET CORNER. CLEAR THE BLACK BULB. COLOR IN THIS WORLD OF BRUTS. PLEASE.
5. The pipe / the cigarette holder
SMOKING IS BAD. But hey, even if it means doing it, you might as well do it with class, right?? Pack up your wraps, take out your pipes and cigarette holders. It doesn’t stop you from doing shit and screwing up your health, but at least you’re doing it in style. It’s already that.
6. Colorful ski suits
In my family, the ski suit is a religion. Not that we promote it, but it’s an object that is passed down from generation to generation… We had two or three moments of shame in snow class, but the family outings were so much funnier. Can you imagine the daronne in turquoise blue outfits going down, followed by her 5 kids of all colors? A real rainbow in your lives guys. No honestly, apart from pissing behind a tree, the ski suit has everything for it: it keeps you warm, no snow in the derch in the event of a fall and colors that warm the heart in the cold of winter. WE SAY YES.
7. WIZZs on MSN
Clearly the best MSN invention in its (too) short history. For those under twenty who must not know: basically, the Wizz allowed you to politely harass your friends if they allowed themselves to leave you in sight! You sent them this thing that shook their screen, that made a huge noise or an unbearable music, a way of reminding them that you were waiting for a response, in fact. Really, MSN, we miss you.
8. Gifts in cereal packages
It was clearly THE thing that guided the choice of our package! Plastic games, small stuffed animals, but ESPECIALLY… the OUFBALLS!!! A kind of small flat ball, half ball cushion / half soft hockey puck, which unleashed everyone in the schoolyard. THEN YES, the games have been removed to fight against obesity and for environmental issues, but still… What’s missing?
9. The Hubba Bubbas
The roll of chewing gum that made you the star of school. The thing did not have any particular taste and you threw it away after 4 min 30, but it was cool. Inexplicably cool.
Translate “song compilations”. No, we’re not talking about an old Spotify playlist. We tell you about the REAL compilations, which we took care to put on CD or cassette, to have fun in the car or just to flirt with our crush. It was work, it was stylish, and above all, it was exchanged between friends! YES, we can do that quickly via the networks and the various listening platforms today, but admit it: it still has less charm… We have brought vinyl records back to life, now let’s bring cassettes back to life.
11. The 3D Pinball Game
Our life as a geek has, in part, started there, with this game so simple and yet… so crazy. Addictive. Incredible. Free. Ah yeah, it was mostly that in fact… It was free, automatically installed on Windows, and much more fun than Minesweeper: enough reasons to appreciate it, and above all… to regret it.
12. The Heelys
Aka roller shoes. A revolution for young people in the 2000s. The brand still exists, but it has unfortunately lost its fame. It’s sad, because really, it was quite incredible to be able to ride like that, in the middle of a short ride. In the college halls. In the middle of the supermarket. So much fun and feeling of freedom, mash!!! Too bad they are so ugly though. Really. There might be a little effort to be made on that side.
13. Handwritten letters
Maybe my “blue flower” side talking, it’s true. But I don’t know, it’s something that stays, that gives pleasure, that embellishes a day. You’re there, quiet, you take your mail, and in the middle of all these shitty bills, a letter from your boyfriend/girlfriend, a friend, or even your grandma. And bam, we forget the rest and we like it. Whereas when you only have invoices and the Lidl magazine in the middle… Bah, it’s less nice, what.