Hello hello the electos (because I repeat it to you: GO VOTE), how are you in this period of between-two-rounds? I ask you, but in reality, I know… You’re not on your plate, eh? Come on, courage, we love you. Fortunately, our politicians don’t just ruin our morale: they also know how to make us laugh. At their expense, of course, but still… The little boomerang returns that they regularly take in the face sell us dreams. “Mirror mirror, everything you say comes back to you”, hihi.
1. “My value is work, not help.”
Pécresse, in June 2021.
“Give me money to pay off my campaign” (almost): Pécresse always, April 11, 2022. BouhouahahaAHAHAHAHAH.
2. “There is social injustice between those who work hard for little and those who do not work and receive public money.”
AHAHAHAHAH. Sorry but… Fillon who points the finger at those who live on public money… AHAHHAHAHAHAH! I haven’t laughed so fucking hard in a long time.
3. “I would like there to be no sentence adjustment measures for sentences longer than 6 months.”
Guess who, after being sentenced to one year in prison in the Bygmalion case, benefits from an adjustment of sentence and will be satisfied with a simple electronic bracelet instead of a real detention? You have it ? Hehehe. .
4. “All our forces will be directed towards a single goal: to reverse the curve of unemployment within a year.”
Hollande, on December 31, 2012, before adding “We will have to achieve this at all costs”. A year later, the number of job seekers has gone from 3,000,000 to almost 3,300,000. Well yeah!
5. “The Republic is me!”
Mélenchon, before the Republic left him on the floor for a third time. Sniff.
6. “SciencesPo is a big family.”
Olivier Duhamel, during the solemn return of students. Maybe he meant “Grande Familia”, didn’t he?
7. “The risks of coronavirus contagion are very low. »
Agnès Buzyn, end of January 2020. A month and a half later, we were confined for two months. Two years later, we still have our noses in it. Well done, Agnès, your clairvoyance honors you.
8. “The use of the mask (outside the indications) is useless”
Olivier Véran, in March 2020. Ptdrrrr, do you remember when it became compulsory for everyone, everywhere, all the time, even outside? Too funny.
9. “I will certainly not be a candidate in 2022, you can archive, I am someone very clear!”
Hidalgo, in 2020. Like what, you always have to trust your first intuition, huh!
10. “I have no opponents left.”
Roussel, a few weeks ago. Someone to tell him that he was taken down by Jadot and Mélenchon, that is to say, two left parties? I’m crying of laughter.
11. “I’m the only one from a working class background.”
Hidalgo, early April. Response from Poutou on Twitter: “Hello, delighted. Raaah damn, the king of the clash has struck again. Change nothing, Philip.
12. “If I were indicted, I wouldn’t be a presidential candidate. Moral issue »
Fillon, end of August 2016. Guess who was indicted in March 2017, when he was a presidential candidate? Alalalala, the nerve has no limit. It’s fucking beautiful. Thank you François for this crazy laugh. (The video)
13. “The underground economy in some of our suburbs is such that poor people cannot live normally.”
But anyway… But… Patrick Balkany? We agree that you are referring to your own “management” of finances, there?? Nope ?? But… Words fail me. I’ll let you watch the Daily video, right there.
Like what, before speaking, it’s really no worse to turn your tongue 7 times in your mouth. If ever you don’t really understand why it’s funny, I advise you to get up to speed with legal affairs, politics and big presidential twists… In the meantime, I’m going to finish enjoying myself by remembering the quotes from the Fillon couple! The art of being a sketch without wanting to.