Life is badly done: there are horrible things trivialized by society like pineapple on pizza and others that are taboo when frankly, there’s really nothing to it. A bit like the rules of society that should be prohibited, the things listed below should clearly become commonplace things in our daily lives. It is for the good of France that I say that, read my electoral program.
1. Having lettuce between your teeth
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Between us, who has never had a little piece of spinach leaf or a piece of sesame seed stuck between the snags after lunch? They must be counted on the fingers of one hand. So for all the other toes out there, let’s make it normal and let’s all walk around with a leaf of lamb’s lettuce in our mouths on August 5th in protest.
2. Compliments your clothes to strangers on the street
You are all beautiful and all beautiful, why not ask someone where he bought a piece of clothing that we find stylish so that he/she is dressed for 24 hours?
3. Have halos under the arms
Sorry, but as soon as it gets over 25°C (and it will soon become more frequent than you think), I lose all ability to control my sweating. That’s how it is, that’s nature, and that of approximately 95% of humans. So let’s stop laughing at people who have little swimming pools on their t-shirts and who make sploush sploush armpits.
4. Farting in public
Wouldn’t we all have less belly pain if we let go of our little prouts when necessary? Far less the idea of launching a continuous concerto, but it would make it possible to suffer less from the judgment of others when a call for air escapes unexpectedly.
5. Having eye poop
One thing that people who don’t wear mascara have a little more trouble understanding, but small eye poops are very common and often you don’t feel them. No need, therefore, to play the big disgusted, you too had your eyes glued when you woke up this morning and we said nothing.
6. Stinky feet (a little)
Inevitably, when your little toes, as silky as they are, spend several hours locked up sweating (like you in the gym), they have a tendency to stink. Well, we’re not saying that not washing your ieps for 5 days is an option, be careful! But let’s say we should accept the fact that feet will never smell the spring flower that blooms in an undergrowth and that it’s not death.
7. Biting your nails
Some people need to express their stress and do it on their fingernails, but that doesn’t make them filthy people. On the other hand, if you continue to tell them that they have to stop nibbling their fingertips because it’s not pretty, it’s your nails that they’ll be biting.
8. Pooping at work
Nature has endowed us with intestines with needs to be satisfied, so to prevent the Earth from having more constipated people than it already has, let’s normalize the fact of freeing ourselves on the job, when we feel like it. By cleaning behind, of course, bunch of big disgusting.
9. Gurgling noises
Yes, I’ve had the slab since 10:30 this morning, yes, my body really wants to express its ingratitude in front of so much negligence and yes, I’m going to smash this lasagna dish in less than four minutes. So let’s normalize the blurps, grlls and other gimmicky noises.
10. Telling someone they have a booger sticking out
There is more annoying than having the feeling that you have a booger on the edge of the nostril just after blowing your nose: really having a booger on the edge of your nostril after blowing your nose. Rather than getting offended and hating over seven generations the person who points it out to us, we should rather say thank you to him for his benevolence.
11. The use of toothpicks in society
The guy is there, he reaches out to you, and you, you should refuse his love just because society has decided not to? How unfair…
12. Have sharp elbows
Frankly, we are more than fed up with discrimination against people with sharp elbows! When will we be able to go into the cinemas and donate our blood like everyone else, huh??