Yes it’s good we all understood it’s hot, you have to drink, the forests of the country are burning and the sales of barefoot shoes are exploding. Suddenly, as it is very hot, the human body tempers and sweats, a beneficial effect of perspiration on our body, this has been the case since the beginning of the world and we are almost all equal on this point. This is why we have finally decided to classify all the areas of the body of sweating from the best to the worst, just to close this debate which has been raging for too long.
1. The forehead
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Forehead sweating is probably the best sweating imaginable: yes it’s visible, but it’s classy, it’s cowboy. And unlike other sweat zones, the forehead is odorless, it doesn’t stink of old rotten feet with four cheese flavor and above all it gives a mirror effect that allows people to style their hair when they see their reflection on your beautiful moist skin.
2. Armpits
Yes it stinks but at least we can tell ourselves that everyone sweats from the armpits, that’s why the deodorant exists, in order to mask this smell of putrefaction of a dead rodent which emerges from yet so little hair. Armpits come in second place because the heat they give off can be used to heat a panini extremely quickly by simply placing it under your arm.
3. Hands
Hand sweat is too unfairly judged: very useful for cleaning dishes when there is a lack of running water or serving as a natural lubricant during sexual intercourse, it is nevertheless precious when used judiciously, hence its position on the last place of the podium.
4. Feet
Sweaty feet are a curse if you want it to be a curse. Once the olfactory sensors of the nose are completely reduced to nothing by the smell close to maroilles that the sweating feet give off, this sweat can above all be used to move quickly on the floor by making long slides. An ecological and refined means of transport that will delight young and old.
5. The crotch
Among the Incas, sweating in the crotch was a sign of good health and nobility. People spreading a sweet crotch-like aroma that smells like the jungle were usually the object of sexual but also culinary desire because people were literally fighting for the privilege of eating their meals directly off their sweaty bodies.
All of this is false. Don’t put it in your copy of the bin.
6. Belly
Did you know that the inventor of the ventriglisse was actually an ordinary customer in a tile store who was sweating profusely from his stomach and had tripped? After sliding nearly 25 meters he got up, convinced that he had found the idea of the century by creating an activity that consisted of sliding on his stomach.
7. SIF
Singular, comforting and warm is the sweat of SIF. Generally compared to the rain of a summer night in the Amazon, it is easily obtained after two hours of driving on the highway of the sun and must be appreciated like an old woolen sweater that we like to find in winter. came or the smell of fresh lemon during a sunny walk on the Amalfi Coast of Italy: a rare and fleeting pleasure.
8. Between the breasts
The sweat between the breasts is often a source of complexes and shame, yet it is also a source of calcium, vitamin B12, natural waving hair and drinking water with multiple virtues. Don’t be ashamed, don’t be afraid, sweat millstones with pride.
9. The back
Sweating your back is probably the worst thing that can happen to you, even worse than meeting Pierre Palmade at a wedding or winning the lottery but having to share the winnings with a charity. It wets the shirt or the T-shirt making it sticky, it runs all the way to the beginning of the ass and people look at you saying “ah but is it raining outside or what? you are so soaked.
10. The inside of the knee
Inner knee sweat (also called popliteal fossa) often irritates people, especially when it begins to bead and run down the calf, giving an unpleasant clammy feeling. Yet the sweat from the inside of the knee is very useful for scouring sinks and has many degreasing properties, used for example by lumberjacks to clean their chainsaws and prevent rust.
11. Mustache
Sweating your mustache is usually frowned upon when you’re about to drink from a water bottle and have to pass it to a thirsty friend right after. And that’s understandable, nobody wants to put this salty bottle in their mouth after you’ve been there, you big disgusting thing.
12. The inside of the elbow
At Hogwarts, sweating the inside of your elbow promises you a place in Slytherin, it’s so frowned upon. People who sweat from this place are usually bad, cheating, like polenta, support FC Lens and charge their phone up to 97% before they think it’s enough. The worst kind.