Even if you didn’t gain a single kilo during your pregnancy, your belly was still very swollen. It’s normal huh, there’s a baby inside (CQFD). Suddenly, after a certain stage, generally from the 8th month, it becomes more and more complicated to do simple things, without looking like an old stranded whale. But it’s okay, after a while he’ll get out of there, and you’ll be able to get back to a normal life, I promise.
1. Wax your neck
That the one who managed to see her shneck to be able to wax at 9 months of pregnancy balance her tips, because personally I have tried everything. How do you manage to bend over backwards, with that huge belly in the middle? The best thing is to leave it all fallow, until you have expelled the piece.
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2. Stand up without rolling over
At the end of the pregnancy, we are closer to the turtle stuck on our back than to the future mother. Have you ever seen an 8-9 month pregnant woman trying to get out of bed? I personally called it the “rolling technique”.
3. Lace up your shoes
Difficult to tie your shoes or even worse to tie them, when you have a belly that contains a baby weighing several kilos in the middle. If you are pregnant in summer, you are very lucky, the flip-flop is your friend. But if you’re due in January, good luck putting on your leather boots.
4. Walk normally
You spend your pregnancy bragging about how perfectly you can walk normally, mocking expectant mothers who duck-walk as if a huge broomstick got stuck in the darkest part of their anatomy. And then one day, your baby decides to start descending into your uterus, and then you understand.
5. Climb a floor without being out of breath
Already you have to carry your own body which has gained a few pounds, you also have to carry your baby in utero, with its amniotic fluid and its enormous placenta. And all that towards the end, it weighs heavy! So you feel like you’ve smoked a whole pack of cigarettes before going up a very small floor, on the verge of looking for Ventolin to calm you down.
6. Watch Babyboom without crying
Before your pregnancy, the Babyboom show made you freak out. Seeing all these mothers throwing their kids out screaming was on the verge of disgusting you. Except that now, with each newborn cry you burst into tears, telling yourself that soon it will be you in their place. Thanks hormones.
7. Sleep comfortably
It seems like a long time ago when you slept straight through, wedged into your pillows, imperturbable. At 8 months of pregnancy, your back hurts, your breasts hurt, your stomach bothers you, your future baby decides to roll around at 5 a.m., and you, you don’t sleep anymore or very badly.
8. Go an hour without peeing
The bigger your baby gets, the more he presses on your bladder. And here you are getting up every quarter of an hour to go piss three tiny drops before going to sit down again, to start again very soon after. The hellish cycle of poop bladder.
9. Look at your feet when you’re standing
Unless you wear size 52, it is clearly very difficult to see your feet while standing, at 8 or 9 months of pregnancy, your belly seems so huge to you. It’s not just an impression, it’s clearly huge. So you’re unable to say what shoes you’re wearing today, since you can’t see anything.
11. Walk without bumping your belly
The more your belly grows, the less you manage to situate yourself in space. You don’t necessarily realize the extent of your volume, and you can very frequently bump your stomach while passing through a hallway, or drop objects that would be placed on a table, just because you can’t see them.
And you, what are the things you had to give up at the end of your pregnancy? Spoiler: yes we know, every woman and every pregnancy is different, no need to cry foul because there are generalities written. Drink a chamomile. Kisses.