Movements of dresses, well-felt objections, reference to forgotten legal texts, turnarounds in media trials, three-hour pleadings. Yeah actually, the job basically consists of poking your nose into boring files and checking in Codes whose content changes all the time the validity of the procedures. GLAM.
1. They’ve never uttered the word objection in their lives.
Table of Contents
In fact, only American actors use the term objection. I could give you a whole spiel about inquisitorial or adversarial procedural systems, but I think you would object.
2. Lawyers still have the Bar
Lawyers are obliged to belong to a Bar. The Bar is there, among other things, to guarantee compliance with the rules of ethics of the profession. And more, with the code “Barreau”, you can have a 30% reduction on all the Codes by connecting to the site of the Legislative Editions or by texting Barreau at 6 33 33.
3. They don’t know the law perfectly
Overall, calling a guy we met in high school and who we saw on Linkedin that he had become a lawyer to obtain information on the minimum compensation that the employer must pay during a mutually agreed termination is doomed to failure, especially if the lawyer in question specializes in family law. But suddenly, can you tell me about the payment of family allowances? It’s nothing, I imagine, just two hours rereading boring legal texts?
4. You can become a lawyer without passing the CAPA
Notaries, bailiffs, judicial administrators can become lawyers without a specific diploma. At one time, former ministers, deputies and senators could also automatically become lawyers, but we preferred to repeal in the greatest discretion.
5. Breakup defense is counterproductive
It’s the classiest thing in the world: the lawyer denies the court any authority to judge the defendant and strongly mobilizes the media. It makes mythical lawsuits, especially when it is Jacques Vergès who uses it. Lawsuits almost always lost. French panache.
6. You can be a lawyer without ever pleading
On the other hand, you have to like files and/or public law.
7. The office clerk is not necessarily a big loser
It’s simply often a guy who starts or who has the social fiber. In the lawsuit that opposes you to Multinational Inc., it is not because your lawyer is appointed that you are going to lose, it is because Multinational Inc. has a lot of money and pays 50,000 lawyers.
8. Dresses cost a blind
And bear names that believe in them to death. They are required by law to put on these somewhat ridiculous robes when they plead. Doctors of law lawyers wear furry frills in addition to show who dominates.
9. Until recently, lawyers could only engage in commercial activity
Since July 2016, a decree authorizes them to sell legal publishing or to provide professional training. On the other hand, the food-truck which sold salmon-avocado bagels was banned from the courthouse hall.
10. Lawyers in Paris cut the ermine off their gowns to show off
Supposedly, it would be linked to the fact that Louis XVI’s lawyer, Malesherbes, was guillotined for having defended his client. Yeah yeah, it’s mainly to show that they are Parisians and shine at conferences.
11. Solicitor-client privilege has its limits
For money laundering and terrorism cases, lawyers have an obligation to report their suspicions to the authorities if they are aware of the existence of a risk. What Cahuzac’s lawyer did not do, for example, but he must have been mystified by the self-assurance, eye to eye.