Top 100+ Best Funny Jokes

You have entered the best bullshit jokes list. Be careful, we are not talking about the best short jokes, and even less redneck jokes, but rather a joke that is a little funny, a little lame and a little cute that makes you laugh more alone on the bus than anything else ( like Mr. Mrs. What). And if jokes are your passion, we also have a selection of the best joke books, to polish your humor.

1. Which granny scares thieves?

Granny Traillette.

2. I have a joke about shopping

But she doesn’t have a supermarket

3. Why is it difficult to drive in the North?

Because cars stop NOT STALLING.

4. Two lions talking

“You have a beautiful mane”

“Stop, you’re going to make me roar”

5. Why do we say that Bretons are all brothers and sisters?

Because they did Quimper.

6. Why do we put all the crocs in jail?

Because crocs deal.

7. How do you light a Breton barbecue?

We use breizh.

8. Why are fish said to work illegally?

Because they don’t have pay FISH.

9. What is the Spanish favorite bar?

Barcelona

10. Why do Mexicans eat in the toilet?

Because they like spicy food

11. What did dinosaurs do when they couldn’t decide?

Drawosaurs

12. What does a tennis player love to do?

Render services

13. Why are the clothes always tired when they come out of the machine?

Because they are leached

14. Why are books always warm?

‘Cause they got a cover

15. Where do the superheroes go shopping?

At the supermarket

16. What happens when 2 fish get angry?

The tuna rises

17. Which fruit is strong enough to cut down trees?

The lemon

18. What is the ham that everyone hates?

The dirty friend

19. What does an ashtray do in front of an elevator?

He wants ashes

20. What does a printer say in water?

I have paper

21. A camel says to a dromedary:

” How are you ? »

“Good, I work, and you? »

“I work, I work. »

22. What is the funniest food?

Rice

23. This cute little TV antenna fell in love with a lightning rod…

She said to him: Say, do you believe in love at first sight?

24. What is an insect’s favorite sport?

The locust

25. Two mice see a bat pass by

“Look, an angel! »

26. Giraffes don’t exist…

It’s a high neck

27. Why does the Hulk have a beautiful garden?

Because he has a green thumb

28. It’s two crazy people walking down the street

The first asks the second: “Can I put myself in the middle? »

29. What is a dead man cutting cheese?

A split-tome

30. How do bees communicate with each other?

By e-mail

31. What is the favorite tree of the unemployed?

The work

32. What about a flower that got a zero on its test?

That she planted herself

33. What do you call a really bad Thursday?

A journey

34. What does a Sephora employee do on their cigarette break?

It perfume

35. What is a pregnant fry?

A fried potato

36. What is an ugly lamp?

A LEDron

37. Two ducks are talking:

” Quack quack “

“It’s crazy, I was going to say the same thing! »

38. Can a chicken speak English?

yes chicken

39. Who lives in the taverns?

beer men

40. What is a cat’s favorite dance?

The cha cha cha

41. What is a carrot in a puddle?

A snowman in summer

42. Why are beers always stressed?

Because they have the pressure

43. Which princess has chapped lips?

Sleeping wood labello

44. Why do fish no longer have a home?

Because we have them trout

45. Why is the rabbit blue?

Because we rabbit

46. ​​Why is Potter sad?

Because no one Harry is kidding

47. What do you call a fight between a pea and a carrot?

A good duel

48. Why don’t wind turbines have a buddy?

Because they always take winds

49. Where would Voldemort go if he decided to play the trumpet?

To Jazzkaban

50. Where do the most dangerous people come from?

From Angers

51. What is a gift that goes away?

A surprise party

52. What is the fairy that children hate?

the fairy C

53. What is white being punished in a corner?

An ugly fridge

54. Which fish doesn’t have a birth certificate?

breaded fish

55. What is the doctor that makes us all cringe?

Osteo

56. Two chips come out of the cinema:

One says to the other: “are we going back on foot or are we taking a dog? »

57. Two dogs are walking

” Did you see ? A brand new lamppost! It’s worth a drink ! »

58. Who is the superhero who is always scared?

The super-sticky

59. Why do researchers have memory lapses?

‘Cause they rack their brains

60. How do musicians choose their flooring?

They choose a Fa Si La Si Ré floor

61. Who is the disease’s favorite musician?

Bach-tery

62. What is the favorite network of anglers?

trouter

63. It’s the story of a hair

He used to be fine, and now he’s pubic.

64. What does a geek do when he’s scared?

It URL

65. What is the most relaxed fuel?

Kerozen

66. What is Flash’s favorite fast food?

Quick

67. It’s 2 grains of sand that arrive at the beach:

“Damn it’s armored today…”

68. What is green and moves underwater?

A sea kale

69. What is the coolest country in the world?

The Yeéémen

70. What does a cow do when it closes its eyes?

condensed milk

71. Which superhero tells the time the fastest?

Speed ​​hour man

72. Why are angels deaf?

Because Jesus Christ

73. What is the favorite fruit of history teachers?

The dates

74. Who is the wifi goddess?

The Goddess L.

75. What is worse than the wind?

A vampire

76. What is a vegan’s favorite weapon?

The rocket launcher

77. A man enters a restaurant:

“Hello, do you serve noodles? »

“Of course, here we serve everyone sir”

78. Who is the hamster’s wife?

amsterdam

79. In which country do people not tan their noses?

In Nepal

80. Two women discuss:

“You smoke after love?” »

“I don’t know, I never looked. »

81. What is a teapot doing in front of an elevator?

She wants my tea

82. Why does Winnie the Pooh really want to get married?

To go on honeymoon

83. What does a mother say to her nerd son when dinner is served?

Alt-Tab!

84. What is the best time to listen to music?

Deezer!

85. What does a geek do when he gets off the subway?

It frees up the RAM

86. What is the most connected animal?

The USB Pig

87. Where do the crackers go to dance?

In biscotheque

88. What is the favorite musical style of doctors?

The blouse

89. What do you call a cat that goes into space?

A chatellite

90. What does a gardener do when he lies?

He tells salads

91. Where does the invisible man go on vacation?

At his transparencies

92. Why didn’t Napoleon want to buy a house?

Because he already had a Bonaparte

93. What does Frodo say in front of his house?

This is where I hobbit

94. What fruits are found in all houses?

Quinces and blackberries

95. Why does a hunter take his gun to the bathroom?

To flush

96. What is the lightest crustacean in the sea?

the clam

97. Why is Valentine’s Day celebrated more in the North?

Because it’s a family celebration

98. What does a computer scientist say when he’s bored?

I file myself

99. With what currency do sailors pay?

With submarines

100. What does an Italian say to say goodbye?

Pasta la vista

101. Where does Messi go when he gets injured?

At the pharmacy

102. What does a footballer ask of his hairdresser?

world cup please

103. What does a Japanese chihuahua say to say hello?

Konichihuahua

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