You have entered the best bullshit jokes list. Be careful, we are not talking about the best short jokes, and even less redneck jokes, but rather a joke that is a little funny, a little lame and a little cute that makes you laugh more alone on the bus than anything else ( like Mr. Mrs. What). And if jokes are your passion, we also have a selection of the best joke books, to polish your humor.
1. Which granny scares thieves?
2. I have a joke about shopping
But she doesn’t have a supermarket
3. Why is it difficult to drive in the North?
Because cars stop NOT STALLING.
4. Two lions talking
“You have a beautiful mane”
“Stop, you’re going to make me roar”
5. Why do we say that Bretons are all brothers and sisters?
Because they did Quimper.
6. Why do we put all the crocs in jail?
Because crocs deal.
7. How do you light a Breton barbecue?
We use breizh.
8. Why are fish said to work illegally?
Because they don’t have pay FISH.
9. What is the Spanish favorite bar?
10. Why do Mexicans eat in the toilet?
Because they like spicy food
11. What did dinosaurs do when they couldn’t decide?
12. What does a tennis player love to do?
13. Why are the clothes always tired when they come out of the machine?
Because they are leached
14. Why are books always warm?
‘Cause they got a cover
15. Where do the superheroes go shopping?
At the supermarket
16. What happens when 2 fish get angry?
The tuna rises
17. Which fruit is strong enough to cut down trees?
18. What is the ham that everyone hates?
The dirty friend
19. What does an ashtray do in front of an elevator?
He wants ashes
20. What does a printer say in water?
I have paper
21. A camel says to a dromedary:
” How are you ? »
“Good, I work, and you? »
“I work, I work. »
22. What is the funniest food?
23. This cute little TV antenna fell in love with a lightning rod…
She said to him: Say, do you believe in love at first sight?
24. What is an insect’s favorite sport?
25. Two mice see a bat pass by
“Look, an angel! »
26. Giraffes don’t exist…
It’s a high neck
27. Why does the Hulk have a beautiful garden?
Because he has a green thumb
28. It’s two crazy people walking down the street
The first asks the second: “Can I put myself in the middle? »
29. What is a dead man cutting cheese?
30. How do bees communicate with each other?
31. What is the favorite tree of the unemployed?
32. What about a flower that got a zero on its test?
That she planted herself
33. What do you call a really bad Thursday?
34. What does a Sephora employee do on their cigarette break?
35. What is a pregnant fry?
A fried potato
36. What is an ugly lamp?
37. Two ducks are talking:
” Quack quack “
“It’s crazy, I was going to say the same thing! »
38. Can a chicken speak English?
39. Who lives in the taverns?
40. What is a cat’s favorite dance?
The cha cha cha
41. What is a carrot in a puddle?
A snowman in summer
42. Why are beers always stressed?
Because they have the pressure
43. Which princess has chapped lips?
Sleeping wood labello
44. Why do fish no longer have a home?
Because we have them trout
45. Why is the rabbit blue?
Because we rabbit
46. Why is Potter sad?
Because no one Harry is kidding
47. What do you call a fight between a pea and a carrot?
A good duel
48. Why don’t wind turbines have a buddy?
Because they always take winds
49. Where would Voldemort go if he decided to play the trumpet?
50. Where do the most dangerous people come from?
51. What is a gift that goes away?
A surprise party
52. What is the fairy that children hate?
the fairy C
53. What is white being punished in a corner?
An ugly fridge
54. Which fish doesn’t have a birth certificate?
55. What is the doctor that makes us all cringe?
56. Two chips come out of the cinema:
One says to the other: “are we going back on foot or are we taking a dog? »
57. Two dogs are walking
” Did you see ? A brand new lamppost! It’s worth a drink ! »
58. Who is the superhero who is always scared?
59. Why do researchers have memory lapses?
‘Cause they rack their brains
60. How do musicians choose their flooring?
They choose a Fa Si La Si Ré floor
61. Who is the disease’s favorite musician?
62. What is the favorite network of anglers?
63. It’s the story of a hair
He used to be fine, and now he’s pubic.
64. What does a geek do when he’s scared?
65. What is the most relaxed fuel?
66. What is Flash’s favorite fast food?
67. It’s 2 grains of sand that arrive at the beach:
“Damn it’s armored today…”
68. What is green and moves underwater?
A sea kale
69. What is the coolest country in the world?
70. What does a cow do when it closes its eyes?
71. Which superhero tells the time the fastest?
Speed hour man
72. Why are angels deaf?
Because Jesus Christ
73. What is the favorite fruit of history teachers?
74. Who is the wifi goddess?
The Goddess L.
75. What is worse than the wind?
76. What is a vegan’s favorite weapon?
The rocket launcher
77. A man enters a restaurant:
“Hello, do you serve noodles? »
“Of course, here we serve everyone sir”
78. Who is the hamster’s wife?
79. In which country do people not tan their noses?
80. Two women discuss:
“You smoke after love?” »
“I don’t know, I never looked. »
81. What is a teapot doing in front of an elevator?
She wants my tea
82. Why does Winnie the Pooh really want to get married?
To go on honeymoon
83. What does a mother say to her nerd son when dinner is served?
84. What is the best time to listen to music?
85. What does a geek do when he gets off the subway?
It frees up the RAM
86. What is the most connected animal?
The USB Pig
87. Where do the crackers go to dance?
88. What is the favorite musical style of doctors?
89. What do you call a cat that goes into space?
90. What does a gardener do when he lies?
He tells salads
91. Where does the invisible man go on vacation?
At his transparencies
92. Why didn’t Napoleon want to buy a house?
Because he already had a Bonaparte
93. What does Frodo say in front of his house?
This is where I hobbit
94. What fruits are found in all houses?
Quinces and blackberries
95. Why does a hunter take his gun to the bathroom?
96. What is the lightest crustacean in the sea?
97. Why is Valentine’s Day celebrated more in the North?
Because it’s a family celebration
98. What does a computer scientist say when he’s bored?
I file myself
99. With what currency do sailors pay?
100. What does an Italian say to say goodbye?
Pasta la vista
101. Where does Messi go when he gets injured?
At the pharmacy
102. What does a footballer ask of his hairdresser?
world cup please
103. What does a Japanese chihuahua say to say hello?