We were all traumatized by our math classes. Starting with the multiplication tables that we had to learn by heart but that we forgot over time because we have high-performance mobile phones that do all the calculations for us. Result of the races we became sub-mental and oozing with terror as soon as we had to do a basic head multiplication. Don’t worry, we’ve stayed as long as you. Let’s go through the worst multiplication tables together in order to exorcise all this suffering.

## 1. The table of zeros

Table of Contents

Obviously you will retort that it is the simplest since any number that is multiplied by zero is equal to zero. OK. Great. But for any normal brained person, it’s morally unacceptable that you can multiply something by nothing.

**The multiplication most likely to cause you a stroke: ** 0x0.

## 2. Table of 7

The worst of the worst. Apart from 7 x 1, I am unable to give you a tit for tat (even 7 x 10, I am tempted to answer you 82, whereas it is 64). Not clearly, the table of 7 lacks courtesy and warmth. The best thing is to delete it and replace it with the table of 11, much simpler.

**The multiplication that makes you want to puke: ** 7 x 8, eat your dead.

## 3. Table of 8

Almost on a par with the table of 7s, that of 8s follows absolutely no logic. We end up with 8 x 8 which is 64 while 2 x 8 is 16, in the same way that 8 x 6 is 48 while 8 x 5 is barely 40. Go figure out the consistency.

**The multiplication that gives you an asthma attack: ** 8 x 7 (certainly sneakier than 7 x 8).

## 4. The table of 9

One might think that the table of nines is easy because it’s just the number before the x 10. So 6 x 9 is 60 minus 6. Now I don’t know about you but my problem with this is that rather than removing 6 or any number that you multiply by 9, I tend to want to remove 9. So 5 x 9 = 41, 7 x 9 = 61 etc. Unfortunately, I tried to put forward this theory but nobody wants to listen to me. To believe that someone is trying to silence me…

**The multiplication that causes you a voltage drop: ** 9 x 4. I never knew how much that was.

## 5. Table of 6

This is misleading. As it is an even number, we feel confident, we say to ourselves that as long as we know how to multiply by 2 we should get by. And then not at all.

**The multiplication that gives you gluten allergies: ** 6 x 3. Of course it’s 18, but everyone knows that 6 x 3 should be 21. We must stop this snobbery.

## 6. Table of 3

Certainly more appealing than the multiplication tables previously mentioned, it is no less unpleasant because of its odd character. The only advantage is that with the 3 we can still discreetly count on our fingers to achieve our ends.

**The multiplication that makes you want to scratch yourself: **3 x 3 which is 12 instead of 16 as we would like to believe.

## 7. Table of 4

Vaguely close to the table of 2. But just like the table of 6, do not be fooled by its friendly appearances, you can very quickly find yourself betrayed by a table of 4.

**The multiplication that gives you gas: ** 4×4.

## 8. Table of 2

Undoubtedly one of the easiest, but not the most fun in the evening.

**The multiplication that makes you fall into syncope: ** 2 x 9. And you know very well why, I won’t explain myself on that.

## 9. Table of 5

Well the table of 5 there I agree. It’s round, it’s clean, it’s clear, it’s precise. You can never go wrong, it ends either in 5 or in zero. The table of 5 is the best dining table.

**The multiplication that makes you get pregnant: ** 5×3. Super sexy.

## 10. Table of 1s

Same as 1 x 12569, I know it.

**The multiplication with which you would go on vacation: ** 1×1.