Raising a child is about as easy as climbing Everest in your underwear, especially when you have to listen to all the weird parenting advice from your stepmom (no stepmom I won’t put parsley in Timéo’s diaper so that he learns to walk). But don’t worry too much: education is above all a matter of culture. In other countries, parents don’t do things the way we do at all, and it’s still going very well. Well, with a few exceptions. Look how they are doing, the others.
1. In Japan, you don’t kiss your child after 7 years old
Because otherwise it infantilizes him too much, and after that what will it be? Will he sleep in his parents’ bed? He will continue to suckle his mother until he is 30 years old? Will he still use a booster seat in the car? Will he be wearing onesies? Yeah in the end it is better to stop the kisses as soon as possible.
2. In Bali, a child should not touch the ground before he is 3 to 6 months old
Related to the fact that children would be sacred and all. Sacred children? Frankly ? It’s obvious that the person who invented this bullshit has never changed a very full diaper and has never been pissed on during said diaper change. Otherwise she would know that the children are just bloody pains.
3. In Mongolia, babies sleep in a hanging cradle
It has become a tradition, but basically it was mainly to protect them from possible predators who could become embedded in the yurt when they had the slab. We can easily understand that we don’t want our child to serve as a breaker.
4. In Russia, children douse themselves with cold water to toughen them up
Does that surprise you from the Russians? Me? Not at all. I would have even thought that they forced their kids to fight with brown bears from the age of 18 months but apparently not. I’m a bit disappointed.
5. In Finland, school is only compulsory from the age of 7
You could say that the guys are big wankers and that starting school at 7 is the best way to create an army of dicks, and yet the Finnish education system is among the best in the world. There, the results are excellent and the inequalities in level much less great than in most countries. We will end up moving to Finland if this continues.
6. In many African countries, the mother practices co-sleeping
Yes, “co-sleeping” is a terrible word loved by parenting magazines, but we must admit that it’s more practical to say than “parents sleeping with the baby”. Most of the time, those who practice it do so until the child is weaned. Because after that it starts to get weird. Imagine the 32-year-old guy who still sleeps with mom. No, don’t imagine, it’s really weird.
7. In Sweden, Iceland and Denmark, children often take naps outside
In these countries, it is considered that the air outside is better for your health, so you often see prams outside with babies sleeping in them, even when the temperatures are negative. The kids are still well wrapped up, but it’s always a little weird when you’re not used to it.
8. In Vietnam, we whistle so that children go to the potty from 9 months
Well, I feel confused so I’ll explain a bit: from a baby’s earliest age, parents manage to create a Pavlov reflex in him by whistling as soon as he pees or poops. So, the day you put the child on a potty, all you have to do is whistle so that he understands that this is where he must relieve himself. Thanks to this technique, Vietnamese children go to the potty from 9 months. Enough to make your sister-in-law cry who is struggling to make sure her 2-year-old son is clean.
9. In the United States, children can take shooting lessons
Yes, because it’s the United States and because there we still don’t realize that firearms cause more deaths than they protect (which is quite logical). Normally we are not supposed to criticize other cultures too much but we can make an exception here.
10. Japanese children can take the subway alone super early
In general, they go outside alone very early and can go shopping for their parents at an age when a European would not dare to leave his child even 2 minutes outside unsupervised. But, in Japan, security reigns in the streets, and it’s immediately much less scary for parents.