Yes, you’re 16 or twice 16 and you’re going crazy with your crew in Barcelona, yes. Too great, plus you had good grades with Ms. Gonzalez in 4th grade, you’re almost bilingual, you’re going to send yourself Moritz on the terrace by being an alternative maxi. Yes; or rather if. Do not bullshit, my big, you could become the target of bandits of all kinds.
1. Sleep on the beach
Yessai there’s the beach. Yessaï we only have to sleep under the stars since it is 40 degrees. In fact, it’s a nice bullshit. They give you two minutes of sleep before someone comes and steals all your stuff. Yes, even the condom you were hoping to use after going out at La Paloma but which, in the end… Well, it happens, you can’t win every time.
2. Take your car
Since Barcelona is 2 hours from Perpignan, the temptation to go there by car is great. The only thing is that Barcelona is super congested on the one hand, impassable in terms of parking on the other, and the scene of many car break-ins somewhere in the middle. In short, it is better to take the metro.
3. Buy cardboard figures sold on the street
In the multitude of street vendors who take up half the sidewalks, those who try to sell dancing cardboard figurines do well. It costs 4 bucks and it will make a souvenir. Except that the cardboard figurines do not move on their own: they are in fact manipulated like puppets by the seller. This is a first rate scam.
4. Tell yourself that you will find a hostel there
Let’s face it, Barcelona is taken over by tourists, especially French, in summer. As a result, you have to book your bed weeks in advance at the risk of not finding anything to sleep at all. And it’s a risk because if youth hostels aren’t expensive at all, mid-range hotels know how to take advantage of demand and charge quite high prices. Or how to double your holiday budget in 2/2.
5. Go out to trendy bars
Tourism obliges, Barcelona is armored with super trendy bars which try to imitate the Berlin or London models. Besides the fact that it’s not very typical to go out there, they generally charge absurd prices. When a half costs 2 euros as a general rule, it amounts to 6 or 7 balls in these lousy bars and the smallest tapas will go for 10 euros. If it’s to pay for your food at the same price as in Paris, you might as well go on vacation to Aubervilliers.
6. Renting an apartment on a weird forum
For several months, the Catalan police have been mobilized against rental scams that are practiced on the Internet. Evil thieves are dangling deadly apartments on the forums or on leboncoin at unbeatable prices. The pigeons are encouraged to go through Airbnb to reserve the apartments against payment of an amount in advance. Obviously, the apartment does not exist.
7. Eat on the Rambla
The Barcelona Champs are like the Champs in Paris: a kind of court of scam miracles. All the restaurants are disgusting, the souvenirs in the shops made in China, the bars outrageously expensive, there are people everywhere and you want to run away. Finally, in any case, we advise you to flee.
8. Go see a flamenco show
Flamenco is not Catalan, it is an Andalusian tradition. Therefore, any flamenco show in Barcelona will be as authentic and quality as an Eiffel Tower menu in Vélizy-Villacoublay. On the other hand, Catalonia has its own musical style, close to flamenco, and which is called rumba catalana. You can listen to good Catalan rumba in the Raval provided you find out about the addresses.
9. Go out on the Marina
The Barcelona marina, built for the 92 Olympics, is the modern part of the city. It runs along the beach and is covered in nightclubs and outdoor bars. Obviously, there are almost exclusively tourists and disgusting cocktails sold super expensive. To party, it is better to go to the city center.
10. Put on a sangria mine
Like flamenco, sangria has nothing to do with Catalan. Besides waking up tomorrow morning with a hangover from hell, you’ll look like a fool to any Spaniard who sees you sipping some yucky red wine with fruit in it. To the limit, push the experience to the limit by accompanying the sangria with a good big paella with not fresh seafood.