If you are someone who likes to ask yourself existential questions all day long, that means several things: small 1, you are surely an anxious person and small 2, you must have already wondered what people were saying about you. in your back. Unfortunately, we won’t be able to carry out the investigation to find out what people are saying about you, but we can already list the situations where it speaks on your face. We all do it, we just have to accept it.
1. When we play the game “Fuck, Mary, Kill”
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If you didn’t live in the 18th century and you went through the “college” box of your life, you have certainly already played “Fuck, Mary, Kill”. But yes, it’s this game where you give the game of three people and you have to choose who you sleep with, who you marry and who you kill. It remains to know in which category people classify you.
“I think of how many times I’ve probably been killed at the ‘Fuck, Mary, Kill’ game.
2. In the ER nurses’ break room
People who work in the ER see so much amazing stuff that they have new stories to tell every day. We often forget that behind these fables, there are real people who inserted eggs into their buttocks or who got 3rd degree burns with their lighter. And among these people, there may be you.
3. At your math teacher’s family meal
You may not know it, but teachers talk a lot about their students to their loved ones. Finally, especially students who answer funny or downright stupid things to their questions. If you’ve ever been ashamed of having said something stupid in class, tell yourself that you may have become an anecdote that your teacher brings out every evening.
4. When we swing “Would you rather?”
We can’t be to everyone’s taste, that’s obvious, and it may therefore have happened that acquaintances used your name in a “Would you rather?” “. Example: “Would you rather sleep with Damien or see your family die in a fire?” “. The hardest thing for you, Damien, is that people were quite hesitant.
5. After kicking yourself ridiculously on the street
You’re the first to make fun of people who fall (and tell your friends about it for 2 weeks) so you won’t be offended that others do the same! Yes, everyone saw you. Yes, it was ridiculous. Yes, you do well to be ashamed and hide.
6. When someone repeats one of your jokes while crediting you
It’s an ego boost and a great satisfaction that you can’t even enjoy, you have to know how to stay humble. It has surely happened that one of your friends or colleagues told other friends “haha it reminds me of what Clarisse said the other day, I have to tell you it was too funny”. Super satisfying.
7. When you go on vacation to a cool place
When you go on vacation, you completely forget your colleagues and your friends who stay at home but they don’t forget you. Moreover, they do not hesitate to say “but what an asshole this one is, he is doing well with his vacation in Bali”. It’s even worse if you post photos in stories, people will be even less embarrassed to spit on your happiness.
8. When you have to leave something nasty to do
When you live with people, whether it’s your family or roommates, you like to pass on the boring things to do. If your brothers and sisters left without doing the dishes, tell yourself that they surely said “too bad, that good pear Damien will do it for us”. No chance.
9. At your therapist’s evenings with friends
It is perfectly impossible for shrinks to keep to themselves all the embarrassing anecdotes and slightly funny neuroses of their patients. Without mentioning your name, your shrink may have already talked about you to his friends in the evening.
10. When someone says “Who forgot to flush? There’s shit everywhere, it’s disgusting”
Even if it is surely not you, it is necessarily your name that comes out because the absent are always wrong. Well done for you, had to be there.
And you, do you often talk about us behind our backs? Come and tell us face to face, we are waiting for you in the offices.