That’s it, you finally stopped finding it cool to be single and now you’re actively looking for a partner to live a love story (or ken wildly)? Then you will surely use dating apps and go through the dreaded first date stage. It’s clearly not the time to do anything, both to avoid taking a huge rake and not to embarrass the person in front of you. So I’m giving you some essential rules so that this risky ordeal turns into a great (or at least not too unpleasant) moment. You will see it is quite simple.
1. Avoid a first date at home
Unless the person has already explained to you their very clear intentions of ken very quickly, organizing the meeting at your place risks embarrassing them. It’s true that it’s not super reassuring to show up at a stranger’s house. You never know, it could be a killer, or worse, a manga collector (pray for his soul). It is better to choose a public place so that there are other people around in case of a problem.
2. Also avoid the cinema for a first date
The problem with movies is that we don’t talk too much about it. It’s very cool when two people just want to watch a movie while rolling big shovels, but it’s not so when you and your date have never discussed in real life. The cinema can wait for the second date. Until then, a bar, a museum, a walk, a bowling alley, a rowing across the Atlantic or a robbery will always be better (be careful, there are one or two pitfalls).
3. Try to find an equidistant meeting place
Maybe you’re very determined and you want to drive miles to get closer to your date, but if not, don’t make him go too far either. Make sure everyone has the same distance to travel to find each other, so everyone will be happy. I will be for you anyway.
4. If your date doesn’t look like his photo, hide your disappointment
This is the most fearsome moment during the first date: when each discovers the true physical appearance of the other, there can be disappointments. Because yes, some reckless people choose photos that are a little too flattering (or too retouched) for their Tinder profile, and the gap with reality can hurt. If you find yourself in this situation, try to be nice anyway: the person opposite may have a big problem with his self-confidence. On the other hand, you can explain to him, with a grain of salt, that you should avoid putting photos of Ryan Gosling when you look like Patrick Timsit. In short, be honest but nice.
5. Looks like your photo
Well yeah, it’s give and take: if you hope not to be fooled, you’d better look like your photos too. And if that’s not the case, like because you’ve gained 20 kilos since that vacation photo in the Vendée, well tell the person you’re going to meet right away. It’s just a matter of respect. And then please change this photo for me, it dates from 5 years ago, it makes no sense.
6. Don’t talk too much about your ex
The subject may eventually come up on the mat at some point, like: “And if not, what was your last long relationship?” » But if you start telling your date how good your ex used to cook pasta or show him your vacation photos from Greece, I can assure you that I’m going to pop in and give you your pint through your eyes. No but seriously it’s very embarrassing to do that and it rather makes your date feel like you haven’t moved on with your ex yet. And that’s not good.
7. You can leave yourself an exit door, but avoid the blow of the emergency call
It can be tempting to suddenly get rid of a date that isn’t going as well as expected. But if your date is boring as death, avoid the technique of having a friend call you on the phone to pretend there’s an emergency: it’s really too toasty. The best thing is to offer an “early evening” drink because you (supposedly) have something planned afterwards. That way, if the date sucks, you already have a good excuse to get out early. And if the date is cool and you’re feeling the good vibes in life, then you can always say you want to stay and cancel your second party. It’s always nice to hear more.
8. Listen to your date
With the stress and fear of leaving blanks in the conversation, you may be tempted to want to talk without stopping and leaving no room for your date. Well it’s wrong, what do you want me to tell you? Don’t be afraid of little silences, it happens, and try to concentrate a little to listen to all the interesting things that your date will tell you. Well, if he or she has been talking to you for three hours about their boundless passion for winter vegetables, I can understand that you want to interrupt them. It’s all about measurement.
9. Split the bill
Whether you’re a guy, girl or gender neutral, pay half the bill. It will avoid a lot of useless debates. The first date can already be stressful enough so now is not the time to embarrass yourself with boring questions like that. Then if there are other appointments planned then there will always be time to invite each other to have fun. Because it’s true that it’s always nice to be offered a drink (unless it’s a Monaco, frankly stop drinking that people please).
10. No need to get caught on the first night
If it happens naturally, that’s great, but not everyone is on the same pace when it comes to snogging someone who was just a stranger. barely 3 hours ago. It can be annoying. Therefore, take your time as people who made German LV1 would say. Propose a second date instead, and if it goes well, the big, slobbery kisses will come in due time.