Top 10 reasons to stop using invented names

Well, we’ve been trying to get the word out to you for about 27 tops, but nothing works, you continue to want to be original by giving unusual first names to your children. After first names from series, first names from the Middle Ages, this time we are tackling invented first names. There is a difference between wanting to be “original” and having taste, sorry not sorry.

1. It’s ugly

Ah well yes, we attack directly in the heart of the matter, we hit the bacon, WE DENOUNCE: the invented names are not beautiful. No. I don’t know if it’s the drop in hormones or the lack of sleep that made you believe that Térébulane was a good idea for a first name, but you still have a little time to go to the town hall to rectify the situation.

2. It’s not original

Misconception: giving an invented first name to your child will make him different and original. It’s a lie, it’ll just kick him out of all the birthday parties, that’s all. Giving a made-up name won’t make a difference to anyone but him because he’ll be the vikos of the whole school, poor thing.

3. It’s not cool for your child

Can you imagine his future social life? His future job? Do you really think he could be fulfilled by calling himself Fleuve? No, it failed. Everyone will make fun of him, or will try to find him a nickname so as not to have to call him by his real first name.

Top 10 reasons to stop using invented names
Picture credits: Topito

4. No one will dare to tell you what they think

You’ll spend years thinking you made the right call calling it Bleach, but that’s just because the people you hang out with will never dare to tell you their bottom line. They will just tell you “ah, that’s not common, say so”, rather than telling you sincerely: “but you took crack at birth or what? »

5. We have never seen a little “Clafoutis” become President of the Republic

No, that never happened. So I’m not saying that only Emmanuel, François, Nicolas or Jacques can access the throne, but it still helps a lot to integrate. With a little Clafoutis in power, we especially expect her to bake us cakes instead of presiding over the Council of Ministers. You think no one gives that name for real? Ah bah tell it to the daughter of André Courrèges, the famous couturier. For real, his daughter has this first name.

1662899208 484 Top 10 reasons to stop using invented names
Picture credits: Topito

6. No, Amazon is not a first name

IT’S A FUCKING FOREST GUYS! So yes, there are kids who are called France, ok, that’s ok. But the Amazons, seriously? You couldn’t satisfy your desire for exoticism by eating pineapple, for example? Or watching videos of Thalassa? I mean, there are easier things to do huh.

7. Snorkel either

No, Tuba is not a first name. Already as a word, it’s limit limit, so frankly, giving the first name Tuba to a baby, must have a certain level of bullshit well established. But what the hell is the Registry Office doing? Where are they when we need them?

8. Shouldn’t it be classified as VEO?

But if you know, VEOs are ordinary educational violence. Does giving a very ugly made-up name not pass for an act of psychological humiliation? You have two hours.

9. At best it makes you look like a boo, at worst like an idiot

When there was the wave of fruit names like “Cerise” or “Mirabelle”, we all said to ourselves that it concerned parents who lived in the 11th arrondissement of Paris. Rightly so. So if you perpetuate this weird tradition but you live in Limoges, you’re not a bobo, you’re just stupid.

1662899210 166 Top 10 reasons to stop using invented names
Picture credits: Topito

10. Not all trends are to follow

Look how sorry they are, the parents who called their kid Daenerys, on the pretext that she was a badass girl in an overrated series. Yeah well, once they saw the said girl burning down a whole city for the kif, they were quickly disillusioned. How will the parents of the future little “Cover” or “Chair” live with this on their conscience? We ask ourselves the question.

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