Screens are unfairly believed to have harmful effects on children. Especially when the exposure time exceeds six hours daily. No, too much screen is not so bad for your health. The explanations of our neuro-psychiatrist at the University of Meudon JeanMichel Inconssian.
In our next issue, find the best places to abandon your children.
1. Imagination is outdated
The escape? Make up stories? Professional writers do this so much better. Do you want unemployed screenwriters these days? Unaware that you are? Some are doing an admirable job: closely studying the narrative framework of season 1 of Paw Patrol, genius. From Andrei Tarkovsky in the text. Anyway, reading is super boring.
2. Wearing 3 cm thick tiles is too stylish
It is essential that children – and this from an early age – play as close as possible to the screen. Prolonged eyestrain will force them to wear glasses with thick lenses. And wearing glasses is too classy (even when you don’t need them). Look at Francis Heaulme, Michel Fourniret or even Kim Jong Il. What handsome guys.
3. Sleep is useless anyway
Children have trouble falling asleep? You might as well learn and spend this useless time in a constructive way by watching many documentaries with strong societal issues such as: the Ch’tis in Ibiza, the Marseillais in Ibiza or the Ch’tis and the Marseillais in Ibiza.
4. The screen, generator of calm
What could be more fulfilling than locking yourself in your room to play long hours at Fortnite? In order to improve the feng shui of the child’s den, eliminate any presence of books and other comics. Indeed, these objects of the devil are the fruit of deforestation. And the planet in all this?
5. Substantial savings
Why pay 7th an hour for a babysitter? The Disney + streaming subscription costs 7 euros per month. In a month, there are on average 30 days of 24 hours each. That is the equivalent of 5040 euros of care saved. CQFD.
6. Natural light is overrated
With the flickering of a screen, no risk of sunburn. The dazzling heat of this hot star that the ancients call “sun” can hurt the eyes of children. Do you really want your children to suffer? Tssss.
7. Social isolation allows us to avoid disappointments in friendship
We know – especially at an early age – friendship is essential. However, an argument can break your child’s heart and make him dwell for weeks on end. Prevent this as soon as possible.
8. Because talking is useless anyway
In order to avoid any angry subject at dinner time, Topito would strongly advise you to break this potentially explosive discursive dynamic. How ? Each member of the family should have a screen under their nose. Eating in different rooms is a plus.
9. Show them the example by being yourself on your smartphone throughout the day
When they tirelessly scroll through their timeline in search of essential information (video of collective fights, bread recipes, flat-earth theory, etc.), Mom and Dad seem to be reasonable adults. Might as well do the same, right? It’s not French. It does not matter: everyone has understood.
10. Sports? Let’s be serious… it sucks!
In the context of a team sport, defeat is very hard to swallow, a real heartbreak. Not to mention the risks of orbiting the coccyx after a bad fall. No, no, no and again no. Your child needs to get away from it all. The screen will effortlessly channel this need to exercise.
It may not have escaped your notice that everything written above is a bunch of nonsense. Let’s not be afraid of words: of provocation. There is a happy medium to be found because “too much screen is not necessarily better than no screen at all” (unverified quote from Confucius).
If, however, screens are your hobby, we have selected the best LCD screens for you. Do you feel the good advertisement?