When you go to the restaurant, you have to share this moment with lots of other customers and some are so unbearable that you want to hug the waiters to console them. They are relous, impolite, generally detestable and it would almost make us regret the confinement.
1. The family mistaking the restaurant for daycare
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In each restaurant, there is this family which comes with its string of kids and which decides not to deal with it at all. It shouts, it plays hide-and-seek under the tables, it overturns glasses with larigot and everyone is exasperated.
2. The guy who had 20 minutes to choose but still doesn’t know
In a large table, there is always ONE guy who can’t make up his mind. He is the last to order and still says to the waiter “ah damn sorry, I don’t know… can you come back? “. Eating with this person is always a torture, she just deserves that we forget to serve her.
3. People who FaceTime during the whole meal
It has become increasingly common to come across people eating at restaurants while video calling loved ones. It could easily be done discreetly without disturbing anyone but no, you absolutely have to turn the sound up and speak very loudly. The worst part is that there are people who do this when they are not even alone at the table.
4. People who abuse the all-you-can-eat buffet (and waste 10kg of food)
If you’ve ever been to a fancy vacation club with an all-you-can-eat buffet, you’ve probably seen those families who help themselves to excessive amounts of food and leave half behind. I could cry in front of such a spectacle.
5. Parents who leave kids with an iPad, volume up
If a meal drags on and the kids are bored, it’s completely understandable to let them use a phone. What’s always shocking is to see unfazed parents facing a child playing a game or watching a cartoon with the volume turned up, without headphones. Whether on the train or at the restaurant, it’s unbearable and these people deserve prison.
6. Pigs who make inappropriate remarks to waitresses
Everyone hates you and I would like the managers of these businesses to throw you out without delicacy.
7. People who think they’re a little too at home
In the restaurant, you immediately notice people who are a little too comfortable. Some help themselves behind the bar and others go into the kitchens when you don’t even dare to take the fork from the table next door when yours has fallen on the floor.
8. The table that requires changes for each dish ordered
Asking to remove the pickles or put an egg in place of the meat is completely acceptable and no one is judging you for it. On the other hand, it’s immediately more annoying when 25 people ask to change half of the ingredients in all their dishes.
9. This guy who orders a coffee and squats the room for 6 hours
We know it’s nice to work in a café-restaurant all day, but the problem is that we would like you to take a break so you can eat. Go to a library!
10. The old people who tell their life story when the restaurant is crowded
As in supermarkets, on the bus or even on the street, old people are boring in restaurants. They’re not mean, that’s not it, but the waiter has other things to give a damn on a Saturday at 1 p.m. than listening to Germaine talk about her arthritis and her neighbor who puts the music on way too loudly.
We like to criticize the worst waiters but if I had to put up with these insufferable customers every day, I too would talk badly to you.