YEYEYEYAYAYEYEYAYA (That’s how they say I believe). Everyone loves Koh-Lanta, it’s also the second thing that brings the French together after the football world cup, Denis Brogniart can be proud. We remember the biggest scandals of Koh-Lanta and the mythical candidates of Koh-Lanta but what we talk about too little is Denis’s mind to stay serious by counting the votes. Candidates could write “Moundir this big bastard I hate him” and Denis would keep calm while reading the paper. To pay homage to the most scandalous spelling errors of Koh-Lanta, we made a ranking (from the most passable to the worst of the worst) of the most massacred first names in the show.
Javier with an E is at the bottom of the classification because it is an understandable fault but the problem is that Bernard pronounces it outright with a French J. “Javière, I’m voting against you tonight because of your lack of fair play and your arrogance”.
A letter is missing but as it is the first name of Philippe aka “The first name massacrer”, we will not say anything. We hope that his little bezo Wasn’t too disappointed…
The Koh-Lantos know it well, the 2020 edition was not the first experience of Teheiura who is a recurring candidate for Koh-Lanta. In 2012, in the special edition La Revanche des Héros, he was eliminated from the council by the votes of Patrick, Bertrand, Coumba, Moussa and Wafa. Of all the papers that Denis takes out of the ballot box, many bear Teheiura’s name but are misspelled (obviously). “Theoura” is really the worst but we also saw a “Tehe” (not too much risk-taking).
At the point where we are, why not simply add letters? We could even have put an h in the middle and “-ent” at the end as if it were a verb.
If we can add letters, we might as well remove the ones we don’t hear. Wouldn’t that be easier? Denis becomes “Deni”, Jules becomes “Jul” and Mathilde would be written “Matild”. It’s much better.
There was hesitation on Mickaël’s part. He sat down, thought, crossed out and finally put his masterpiece in the ballot box: Bernad. Why ? Why keep the D and not the R? No one will ever know…
There is disagreement on the side of the reds. For Mickaël, we must vote against Bernad, we have understood that. For Marylou, it would be more strategic to vote against Bernar. Difficult to agree.
8. Lisa Belle
In third place in the ranking of misspelled first names in Koh-Lanta, we obviously find the good Philippe who trained for years in his garden. This time, he decided to vote against Lisa Belle. Perhaps a hidden declaration of love…
Our national Philippe, the legend of Koh-Lanta, has more than one spelling mistake in his bag. When Denis shows the paper and Thierry turns his head towards Philippe, we immediately understand that his spelling has betrayed him. A good 8-year-old laugh that deserves second place in this ranking.
One of the best moments of Koh-Lanta. Namadia takes out her immunity necklace at the council and the candidates are amazed. The votes against him are therefore not counted and it is Javier who is eliminated. When Denis shows the paper where it is written “Ratvière”, Javier’s face of incomprehension is absolutely hilarious and Marylou cannot help bursting out laughing. Namadia, a smirk all along the advice, will add for Javier “You were planning to go on the posts, well you can watch them from home”.