Hi my calissons from Aix, here I am back after being replaced by QuentinD last week who did an admirable job of taking over the torch of champions of the week, these unusual miscellaneous facts that we find every week with the precious help of @justetitle, a person who probably has subscriptions to every newspaper in the world.
1. In the UK, a priest caught having sex with a vacuum cleaner
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Topito’s analysis: I’m not saying it was an accident, but sometimes you’re quietly cleaning your room naked, you slip and the unthinkable happens right when someone walks into the room. It happens.
2. Surrounded by the police, he gets sausages delivered
Topito’s analysis: Damn for damn much enjoy his last moments of freedom and have fun before prison, especially when you have the slab.
3. Why are more and more Americans carving recipes on tombstones?
Topito’s analysis: Honestly, I’m going to stop being amazed every time new bullshit comes to us from the United States. As a reminder in this country there are people who film themselves shooting in tornadoes, so receipts on tombstones is not so surprising.
4. Verbalized alone in a lane dedicated to carpooling, a mother-to-be shows her belly to the policeman
Topito’s analysis: Technically it was not completely stupid to justify the fact that there were several in the car to show that she was pregnant. Finally not stupid, we will say that it was rather tempted.
5. In Colombia, a city evacuated because of a giant cloud of cannabis
Topito’s analysis: Really the weather there is a whole other level, clouds of weed smoke coming in your face is original. But at the same time it’s Colombia, it’s more or less the country of drugs so it’s not so surprising.
6. Passengers on a Ryanair Toulouse-Marrakech flight seize the plane after a delay of several hours
Topito’s analysis: Okay, that’s a magnificent act of revolt which shows us that us French people when we’re feeling sluggish and hot, we can do anything, take the Bastille or a plane, we’re unstoppable when we’re together.
7. Aveyron: 6 meters high, the world record for the longest aligot thread was beaten in Laguiole
Topito’s analysis: We’re not talking about all the unusual world records each time one is broken, but there… Honestly… The longest aligot thread? Is it really considered a discipline? Because if that’s the case I want to drop everything to get started.
8. Russia Claims It’s Confronting Mutant Soldiers In Ukraine
Topito’s analysis: Close to using the phrase “we had the sun in our eyes during the fight”. You have to know how to recognize your defeat at some point, really the kind of people who blame the controller when they lose at Fifa.
9. A dog runs away, wins a beauty contest and returns to his mistress
Topito’s analysis: I’ve seen children’s films with less incredible scenarios, clearly my new hero this dog. Can’t wait to see the Netflix series on him in 14 seasons.
10. He breaks into Drake’s Beverly Hills mansion and claims to be his son.
Topito’s analysis: After the fake Drake in a nightclub, here is Drake’s fake son who breaks into his home and uses his fridge for free. He will go far this kid I can tell you.
And while waiting for next week take care of yourself and your grandparents. And go read the teubés of the week too, it’s always cool.