Top 10 dumbest news stories, champions of the week #378

Hi my madeleines, how are you today? We are not doing too badly, the weather is nice, the birds are singing and a good smell of cookies floats in the air. Well, now that I’ve created a reassuring and comforting atmosphere, I suggest you escape for a few moments to go to unexplored lands, those of the champions of the week, these news items that take us on a journey to discover unusual stories. Once again we’re doing a big-up to @adjustedtitle, someone we imagine great.

1. The customs dog eats part of the 25 kg of cannabis, the trafficker walks free from court

Topito’s analysis: A dark dog, overwhelmed customs officers, one more trafficker who goes back into the wild… An ordinary day in court.

2. Côtes d’Armor: rugby players celebrate their victory naked on the rest area

Topito’s analysis: For athletes it’s called a proper celebration, but in the eyes of the law it’s called exhibitionism and it’s a crime. Shame.

3. Laon: he pays with checks from his mother-in-law whom he hates

Topito’s analysis: Sometimes you have to find little ways to show someone you hate them without telling them directly. Using your checkbook to pay for your purchases is a really great idea.

4. The window of his shop is too colorful, he is summoned by the police

Topito’s analysis: There are still people who are summoned by the police for ridiculous things, there it is completely stupid, but you have to see the colors notice, if that is really disgusting.

The boss, who has been in business for seven years, was summoned by the police when he was just trying to make his offices attractive.

Posted by Capital on Friday, May 6, 2022

5. Mistaken for a lion, a bag is causing panic in Kenya

Topito’s analysis: You can quickly confuse one thing with another when you look quickly, it happens. But seriously a lion with a bag? Even hidden behind bushes you can see it’s a bag, right?

In Kenya, national park officers have declared a state of high alert after receiving reports that…

Posted by Le Point on Friday, May 6, 2022

6. United States: she finds a Roman statue over 2000 years old in a thrift store

Topito’s analysis: So we can sell Roman busts in thrift stores now, first news. I have a dozen in the garage and nobody warns, great.

7. United States: he dies while digging the grave of the person he has just killed

Topito’s analysis: If you don’t believe in karma you might change your mind reading this info, because in terms of the “sprinkler being watered” demonstration it’s strong.

8. This former footballer wants to become a windshield replacement world champion

Topito’s analysis: Second career, best career. That’s a professional retraining that commands respect, we wish him good luck for the qualifications.

9. 500 kilos of cocaine seized on a Nespresso site

Topito’s analysis: Coffee that wakes you up well, maybe a little too much. Small delivery problem probably, in any case you will have to explain that to the police.

Swiss police seized more than 500 kilos of cocaine Monday, May 2, in a shipment of coffee beans from a Nespresso factory in Romont, western Switzerland

Posted by La Dépêche du Midi on Thursday, May 5, 2022

10. The boss of hunters urges the French to walk “at home” to avoid accidents

Topito’s analysis: Now that he says it is true that it is the most logical solution. We let hunters kill animals all the time and we stay at home, clearly the best option.

And wishing you a good end of Sunday I suggest you go see the teubés of the week, it’s as cool as a hot bath.

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