Top 10 boring things when your first name is in fashion, cheer up Emmas

According to a study, it would be less of a mess in the world if all its inhabitants had a different first name. The problem is that, firstly, there aren’t enough different first names and we would have to invent new ones each time, and secondly, I completely invented this study, so we’re not even certain that it would really fix things. But then what are the really boring things when your first name is in fashion? Well you’re in luck because that’s the subject of this top which, basically, had to deal with the evolution of the course of the Norwegian krone through the ages, a currency that it is not like the others.

1. We always have the impression that we are called, but in fact not

On the bus, in the street, in the swimming pool and sometimes even when you’re in the bathroom: having a fashionable first name often causes funny misunderstandings. You are quietly at the cinema with your date when someone shouts “Hey Jeremy, you have a small cock!” and there you go, even if it wasn’t for you, it’s over, the idea is settled and it won’t leave the thoughts of this person you were trying to charm. Fucked up world.

Top 10 boring things when your first name is in fashion, cheer up emmas
Picture credits: Topito

2. Hateful people are more likely to have the same first name as you.

It’s pretty obvious, the more your first name is worn, the more likely it is to be worn by uncool people. Worse, you can have a connoted first name. For example, if your name is Vincent, you share that with Vincent Bolloré and Vincent Lagaf, two people who (among other things) have done a lot of damage on French television. So you didn’t ask for anything and presto, you’re in the same box as these people. Sad planet.

Top 10 boring things when your first name is in fashion, cheer up emmas
Picture credits: Topito

3. Your friends will probably name their child your name.

If they don’t choose one of these most given first names since confinement, they risk taking yours. And it won’t be some form of tribute, oh no. Besides, they will probably even say to you “Ah but your name is Matteo too? Oh yeah, sorry, we liked that first name so we’re not going to change now you understand, three months from birth it’s a bit late. And it’s called “friends”… Poor globe. (I’ll probably run out of formulas like this before the end of this top, so bear with me.)

Top 10 boring things when your first name is in fashion, cheer up emmas

4. People call you by your last name.

Or by a rotten diminutive. In general, since it becomes difficult to differentiate you in the office with your homonyms, people will tend to find a nickname, a diminutive or, for lack of better, to call you by your last name. And there’s nothing more boring than that damn it, you have a first name it’s not so that people don’t care. Since when does everyone allow themselves to treat you like shit? Defend yourself. Cruel star.

5. Luc Besson risks making a film whose title is your first name one of these days

It’s not always the most fashionable, but he likes the titles of films with first names “Arthur and the minimoys”, “Angel-a”, “Léon”, “Lucy”, “Nikita”, “Valérian”, “Jeanne d’Arc”, “Anna” or even “Eva” as a producer. Concretely, you have a huge chance that he will attack your first name in a film whose quality can be extremely variable and it’s very sad. Ruthless universe.

6. Strangely, people are less likely to remember your first name

The more we see an ad, the less we watch it because it pisses us off (it also works with the person you married lol redneck matrimonial joke, new concept). Well it’s the same with first names. Once you have twelve Mathildes and fifteen Thomases in your repertoire, you’ll start to give a damn and maybe even hate them for no real reason. Complain to your parents who clearly have no originality or (and this is most likely) had little to do with the first name you were going to wear. Cursed Earth.

Top 10 boring things when your first name is in fashion, cheer up emmas

7. Because in class, every time someone has the same first name, it’s someone better

And suddenly your teachers mark you even less well, it’s obvious. Since the other is a fayot of first and that he / she does his homework well, you are cataloged as “the bad Rémi / the bad Lucie”. And it’s not impossible that when making the call your teacher says “Lucie, nah not you the good Lucie, the other one, the one who is stupid there”. It’s always like that, it’s too bad. Painful star.

8. When two of you have the same name in a group of friends

It’s the worst thing on Earth. THE WORST. Already half the time your friends are wrong by calling you rather than the other and moreover as soon as there is a gossip on one or the other people mix up. We always mix up your birthdays and sometimes you even mix up your lives and wake up in each other’s bed while he is at home. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. The only solution is clearly a duel to the death to find out who stays in the gang, that’s all. Terrible round thing full of floats spinning on itself (I’m starting to dry out).

9. Because there is always a shortage of Breton bowls in your name

And a world in which you don’t have a Breton bowl in your name is not a world in which you want to live, believe me. It’s always the same, you go quietly to your favorite bowl retailer and voila, no more “Laurent” bowls. So you do the only thing you can do, you take the “Laurence” bowl and your whole family laughs at you every morning at breakfast: “Hey, how are you, Laurence? lol you are an asshole daddy”. Classic. Depressing flat surface dragging us all in its frantic race (I’m trying to reach the flat public, don’t judge me).

Top 10 boring things when your first name is in fashion, cheer up emmas

10. You ALWAYS pick up someone else’s order

In the famous coffee shops where the employees ask for your name to put it on the cup, always taking care to make at least two mistakes, in the restaurants where you take out your burger and where there is always something missing from your order, at the dry cleaners where you come to pick up your office shirts and have them give you a floral dress… In short, in all these places there is ALWAYS someone with the same first name who has placed an order in same time as you by choosing the exact opposite of what you wanted. And of course you find yourself drinking that old vanilla latte when you’re lactose intolerant and you’re going to spend the afternoon shitting because someone, somewhere, chose the same first name as you for his child. Galaxy bastard.

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