Are you ready for a story chock-full of family drama?!?!
Well, you’re in the right place, my amigos!
Check out this story from the “Am I the A**hole?” page on Reddit and see if you think this dad was out of line for what he said to his daughter.
“My (52M) daughter Amanda (27F) and her husband Chris (25M) married a few months ago.
Amanda has lived on her own since college, but still is in the general area. Currently Amanda and Chris aren’t that focused on their future, mostly on having fun and doing things “while they’re still young.” There’s nothing wrong with that, in my opinion, and I think that young people should have that kind of period in their life, especially after the pandemic.
I got a call from Amanda. She and Chris told me how they have taken several tests and confirmed that Amanda is pregnant! They would be hosting an announcement dinner, but wanted immediate family to know right away.
They could barely wait as they had been trying since they were married. (Note that this was an intended pregnancy) I told them I was thrilled to be a grandpa.
The dinner party happened last week and the announcement was met with only happiness and excitement. Chris and Amanda were talking to a friend and Chris made a comment along the lines of “Good thing that Bobby (me) will while we’re at work!” I was confused and asked what they were talking about. Amanda revealed that she and Chris were expecting me to always watch the baby while they were working and so they could have “fun time” while not working.
Now I love my children and will never regret being their dad. But I didn’t sign up for a new baby. I’m done with all that. I want to enjoy my retirement and be free without any underage children. I explained this to Amanda and Chris, also that there are many great daycare options in the area.
Amanda began to cause a scene because “You told me you were thrilled to be a grandpa!” I responded that exactly, I was thrilled to be a grandpa, not a parent to this baby. She said that I should help out since I don’t have to worry about working (I receive a pension) and that she’s young and these are supposed to be the best years of her life, and she thinks it’s unfair that she and Chris’s life should “be all about a baby.”
I was very frank and responded that “Amanda, of course, you and Chris’s life is going to “be all about a baby.” That’s what it means to be a parent. You should not have gotten pregnant if you just expected someone else to raise your child.” Amanda yelled at me “Don’t be surprised when I put you in a s**tty nursing home”
My son, Michael, says that I was harsh in my delivery by not my message. My son, Nathan, agreed that Amanda and Chris are expecting too much and it was irresponsible to purposely get pregnant when they believe they don’t have time to raise a baby.
My sister, Sandra, however, told me my comment was “callous and misogynistic” and I haven’t raised a newborn in twenty years and don’t realize how much harder being a parent has gotten. And I can agree to start providing at least four days of childcare per week then go from there. Multiple family members are agreeing with Sandra, so I’m looking for some unbiased perspectives on here.
Check out what folks on Reddit had to say about this.
This person who has 17 (!) grandkids said this guy is NTA at all.
And another Reddit user added that expecting someone to help out 4 days a week is pretty excessive.
This individual said that Sandra is an a**hole and that this guy needs to hold his ground.
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